4 years old and still has a dummy!

[sazzler197]

Hi everyone just after a bit advice really, my little girl still has a dummy she has just turned 4!! She absolutely loves it and is so attached to it! She sometimes has it in the day which i am going to stop doing this and give her it at bedtimes only, she only has it if we are in the house, so it is just basically a habit for her now! I have spoken about dummy fairy and things but she get so upset when we discuss it! Anyone had similar experience? I know i should have taken it away from her ages ago but i didn't!! They only problem i have if i do take it away from her her little brother still has one so she is still going to be around them and he is only 15 months so cannt take his away too! I think i am going to start as from tomorrow taking it away in the morning anf giving her it at bedtime and then eventually weaning it off her alltogther! Any advice would be really greatfull!

Thanks

Gwendoline - imaginary good mummy box??

Bears don't distort the palette, move teeth and cause speech problems. I'd rather remove the dummy and tick that good mummy box, thanks very much.

Plus, and let's be honest, dummies make kids that are walking and talking look thick. Teddy bears don't.

I asked the dentist about the dummy and ds.
He looked carefully and chatted with him for a bit. Atleast in his case the dummy isn't causing problems, which is a relief. He speaks more clearly than many of the children a year older than him at preschool, too.

As he looks about a year younger than he is (chubby baby face, short and stocky), it's entertaining watching him take the dummy out of his mouth, ask a stranger something with complex words and grammar, and then put it back if I can't persuade him to let me look after it which works when he's not tired.

As he's a very stubborn git (confirmed by nursery), I'm saving this battle until at least the summer.

DD didn't have a dummy so I can't offer personal experience (Dd is a thumbsucker..a whole different issue!) However a friend told her son that Santa needed to take the dummies away this year and that he would leave an extra present. Her son accepted this and "owned" the whole giving the dummy away process by leaving them out with the cookies/milk for Santa. He didn't get upset at all and was fine afterwards.
Clearly the time of year for that working now has passed but I suppose it's another vote for the "cold turkey" approach/dummy fairy message.

Both my girls had dummies up until they were 4 and on both occasions we put the dummies on the bird table for the baby birds.Then when we went inside they magically left presents .I dreaded taking them away especially with dd2 and i was sure i would regret it but honestly neither of them were bothered and just accepted it.

Thanks again everyone for advice, everyone is different but this is what i have done so far - She has only been having her dummy at bedtime and has gone all day without it, day 1 she was asking for it loads, day 2 not so much, day 3 she keeps saying she is a big girl as she does not need her dummy but said she ws excited for bedtime for when she gets is back!! I have told her eventually the dummy fairy will come and get it and will leave her a present, might leave it like this for a few more weeks and then get rid of it and give her time to get used to the fact that it is going! I have also moved my 15 months olds dummy out of his sight and have restriced his too and he has not been too bad either! Not as bad as i thought but still not got rid of it completely but at least we are going in the right direction! Thanks for all your replies!

My boys all had dummy's for a looooong time! I think I finally hid them all and pretended the shops were all shut just before their 6th birthday by which point they were hiding them under their pillows and just having them at night. They were totally ready to get rid of them and it was no heartache. I would ignore other peoples comments and just do what feels right. If she was attached to a favourite teddy instead of a dummy you wouldn't take that away!! It's only other people's opinions that makes us think they are bad. And ... lastly, none of my children had delayed speech or any of these other 'problems'. It's their little bit of comfort - as long as she doesn't go to school with it in - what's the harm!!