meal / food issues ... or why are meal times a battle.

[boriscalmdown]

god knows why as both me and SWMBO have relatively healthy attitudes to food, but ...

3 times a day the stress levels for me are horrendous with a background spreading by ds none stop eating machine ...

Ds (1.5) has a normal setting of demanding food ... every 15 to 30 mins ... no issue giving healthy food but it is none stop harassment especially as he somehow knows the exact frequency to whinge at that I can't ignore and shreds my nerves.

Dd (4) on the other hand eats like a shrew and meantime are a.constant nightmare to get meaningful food into her, will merrily eat rubbish, but proper food ... no ... sandwiches are dismantled et cetera ...

can't make a battle of it as will come back to bite us when she is a teenager ... et cetera ...

internal screams agogo!

and no it is not a passing phase ... and yes that does mean 'that's just how she is' ... but she needs to learn to eat proper meals ...

"she needs to learn to eat proper meals"

Why?

(I mean, yes, maybe, but it might be helpful for you to articulate why a "proper meal" is important, and why it is important to you to be communicating the importance of "proper meals" while she is 4)

Stop giving in to the whining and relax about 'proper meals'.

I want her to not 'graze' because grazing behaviour has been shown to correlate strongly with obesity in later childhood.

early behaviour patterns are vital which leads me onto ...

ds I ignore it for as long as I can but being on my own for 2 days on the trot and having a low auditory stress threshold ...

it is a conscious case of I need to give him something so I can function and not present a poor rolemodel for them.

dw works 3 long shifts a week so it is literally 3 days lone parenting which just wears my patience away ... god knows how actual lone parents do it!

"I want her to not 'graze' because grazing behaviour has been shown to correlate strongly with obesity in later childhood."

Really? First I've heard of it. I would think making food a battle would be much more likely to lead to obesity and/or eating disorders. Give her healthy food and let her decide what she wants to eat.

I try to avoid giving my ds snacks after 1000 and after 3 pm to make sure he eats well at 12 and 5 it is hard when his demanding snacks but really works, I generally get a good lunch out of him and if I have managed that then am happy with a veg and homous dippy type of tea. Generally I find making sure that he is starving before I feed him really works. If he refuses to eat his meals and doesn't even try it then I leave it for him and when he asks for snacks then tell him that if heis hungry then he can have his meal. I can't be arsed to fight over food and don't believe in forcing kids to eat everything on their plate or to eat what a grown up perceives as being enough as I had that as a kid and spent years with a really unhealthy relationship with food. Also try cooking with them if they are able to, chopping mushrooms with a baby knife is great fun and will make them feel involved in the process of producing the meal