How do you handle name calling?

[FiveHoursSleep]

DD2 is calling everyone names; 'Meanie, freak, cry baby' and all the rest. She's 8 and is quite socially immature. I'm trying to talk to her about how it feels to be called mean names, rather than just punish her and have her stop because she's scared of the consequences but it's incredibly wearying at the moment.
DH and I are pretty good at not calling the kids or each others name, but I guess it happens at school a bit.
Anyone got any ideas?

bumping for you

hopefully justa phase, can you get some time with her for a chat and see if she's being called names at school? may be an issue there

Yeah, that's a good point. She is super sensitive to this stuff herself. I will try and spend some one on one time with her over the next week.

good luck!

this christmas hols may be just the right time for her. a good break.

Just adopt a zero tolerance approach to name calling. No-one is allowed to call anyone any names ever, and that's it.
I won't have it in here. It just doesn't happen. Name calling of any description is stamped on and rarely repeated.

Pictish, can you tell me how to enforce your zero tolerance policy, because I've tried it in my house and it definitely doesnt work. I think they actually do it more.

OP, my children call eachother names and I'm onto it as soon as it happens, I also talk about how it feels to be called names, like you are doing. I think they will grow out of it eventually, especially if they see at home that its wrong. But, like any behaviour, it can take months to see change. Wearying it is....

You have to have the right body language and be very firm and tell them that you don't do it and they are NOT doing it.
If they take no notice I would go on strike. Sit and read a book and not do anything-ignore totally. When they notice just tell them calmly that they have ignored you and so you are ignoring them until they stop. You will happily read your book and you are not getting tea or taking to Brownies etc. It works with me because they know that I am lost to the world if I read.
I have never had to go that far.

It probably doesn't help to talk about it. Just go for the zero tolerance of 'we don't do it in this house and we are not stating-it isn't a subject for discussion'.

Room now was the rule here. I have a dyslexic socially inept DD1, who could be amazingly dippy (much better now she's older). Very tempting for very sharp 3 year younger sister to name call or make some other catty comment.
DD1 gets enough rubbish at school. DD2 was told very firmly not to and any more was simply leave until you want to be nice.
I'm lucky DD2 really hates being on the receiving end herself so generally shuts up pretty quickly.