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Parenting book for 4-5 year olds?

6 replies

DingbatsFur · 12/12/2011 12:44

Hi Folks,
As he has grown out of the Mumsnet guide to toddlers...
DS1 is particularly hard to love at the moment. Anything doesn't go his way he whines or throws a tantrum and (what annoys me especially) doesn't even try to find a way around the problem. For example, he has a small smurf that is meant to 'dangle' from his zipper. He grew increasingly frustrated this morning because the smurf wouldn't stand up on the sofa (because it is meant to dangle). Frustration turns to whining, whining turns to tantrum and I'm baffled. He doesn't listen to the logical 'the smurf is meant to hang not stand' and I am just throwing my hands up in the air in frustration.
Try to suggest to DS1 that he practice his hand writing and he tries for 2 minutes then the whinging starts. He is in P1 and is still writing with both hands equally badly though the teacher says he is progressing normally.
DS2 is 3 and is actually far more reasonable and tantrums far less.
I need to change my tactics here and find a way of getting DS1 (who is actually quite a lovely child when he's not whining) past this. He's a very smart boy he just doesn't try and reacts to difficulties with a whine.
Any useful titles?
Thanks!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
BertieBotts · 12/12/2011 12:47

How To Talk so Kids Will Listen? I'm just starting to find bits of it useful and DS is 3. It's aimed at the younger end of primary age parenting, I think.

HollyGhost · 12/12/2011 12:48

I would reccomend "Playful parenting" which has excellent strategies for this.

I've also just ordered "Beyond Toddlerdom"

CogitoErgoSometimes · 12/12/2011 12:51

My DS wasn't a whiner that age, he was a blubber.... :) If the smurf had refused to stand up or he was finding something difficult (he didn't enjoy writing either) he would have gone red in the face and sobbed like it was the end of the world. Really annoying. In the end, I went the route of 'ignoring it until he calms down'... because I found any kind of pacifying or logical intervention just escalated things. I'd disappear off for a cup of tea, come back a little later, and go for a 'shall we try again?'.

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BlueChampagne · 12/12/2011 13:11

Second BertieBotts

DingbatsFur · 12/12/2011 13:17

Thanks folks have ordered Byond Toddlerdom and Playful Parenting. I just really seem to have lost my parenting mojo with DS1 and I know I need to do more to help him.
Cogito, yes! Thank God it's not only me. I've been trying that too. Just so relieved it's not only DS1 that behaves like that.

OP posts:
CogitoErgoSometimes · 12/12/2011 13:40

FWIW... I don't think you need a book.

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