This should prob be in going back to work thread but...

[adYAWNINGthexmastreemonster]

Not sure where to start but...
Ds was born with some serious medical issues and it has been a real rollercoaster with him particularly in the beginning. He is now 15 months old and I have the opportunity to go back to work 20hrs a week. I am freaking out completely about what to do. I have never left him for more than 4hours before and I am not sure if he could actually manage a full day of preschool, not to mention that we live rurally and I dont drive so getting to and from work would be an issue. Also I need them to be really flexible when he needs hospital visits etc and it is a position that is not easy to get relievers for. To add to all of this I have been gradually dropping breastfeeds one at a time and two time in the last week he has gone 24 hours without any feeds and I cant help thinking this is it, we are almost over this chapter. So much happening, really nervous about making wrong decisions and putting him or me at risk of meltdown and at the same time thinking that it is time to start going back to normality and the fact that he has managed without feeds on some days sort of says that he is starting to move onward and upward and maybe he is beginning to be ready for some changes. Reassurance required!!!

bump.

want to help but am slightly confused about your situation

is he weaned yet? you talk about dropping bf is that his major sustenance .. does he eat properly

do you have childcare lined up? would it be difficult to find adequate childcare

are his medical issues ongoing?

on a personal level even taking away the extra issues you face it is always a difficult step but then isn't everything. if you really want to do it then I would suggest taking a deep breath and making it happen .. it may just what you all need

Oh yawningmonster poor you!
ds is 7 months and I went back to work on wednesday. I had a long thread on the weaning bit as was so worried about how I was going to cope. It is so daunting thinking how on earth you can cope with work isn't it?
I also live in the middle of nowhere, and although I have a car, anything you want to do takes ages because of travelling.
Look, I'm in a bit of a hurry this morning (sorry), but if you need a chat and some reassurance, I'm sure you'll be inundated by mumsnetters, but if not I can post later, or you can CAT me.
Really feeling for you

Sorry if message was confusing. Ds is fully established on solids finally, he was demand bfeed until 12months and then I started to drop feeds gradually, the weaning thing isnt a concern as far as going back to work goes just that it is another change happening and quite an emotional one as he was so sick and so reliant on being fed. His medical issues will be ongoing but are all under control at the moment with monitoring from the hospital and a close eye kept on his diet. childcare is lined up in that he goes to nursery 3 days a week for a morning session at the moment, I am worried about increasing his hours as it does exhaust him and due to allergies I worry about exposure to dangerous foods if he is there for extended periods. Mostly it is a worry about the transition from the intense relationship we have had to letting go a little.

Sorry, wasn't suggesting you were worried about weaning, just boring you with my experiences
It is horrible, though, the prospect of leaving your loved one. You can't prevent nasty things from happening to your kids, but somehow when they are out of sight with someone else and out of your control it feels so much lass safe, no matter how competent the other person is. And, of course, you love them and don't want to be apart from them. Do you have to go back to work?