My first post! Advise on 2yo DD.

[MrsWhitaker]

Hi! My daughter turned two last week and I have made the fatal mistake of comparing her development/my parenting with others from my post-natal group. All their girls are doing things that I haven't got to yet with my daughter and I feel a bit as if I might be holding her back. None of their girls aer doing all of these things but I worry that DD is not doing any of them. So they are using a bed, no dummy, and DD still has a bottle at night. Please tell me HONESTLY if I need to be knocking some of these things on the head (or trying her with the bed)! I'm not too concerned about the potty as I know she is starting to get kinda ready for it I am waiting for the right time as my mother has just had an op and grampy is looking after her for 2 hours a day while I am at work, so prob not the best time to try it. Poor man, he is very hands on with most things but he is a bit old fashioned about that kind of thing and is really trying his best! What ages did you do these things with your children?

FWIW, my DS turned 2 on the 11th, still has a dummy at bed time and is in a cot. Right now it works for us. I know its easy to compare to other children - goodness knows I do too - but remember you and your daughter are both individuals. And welcome to mumsnet :-)

I don't think there's any point in moving to a bed unless they can climb out or are trained at night. One bottle at night would not concern me at this age. Mine gave them up themselves around this age. I've no experience of dummies. Again I shouldn't think its a problem unless she uses it during the day and its effecting her speech. I really wouldn't worry.

I agree don't stress - sometime between 2 and 3 is a good time for all of those things - some people just want to rush through the stages - and if she is not climbing out of her cot keep her in it as long as possible!!!

Well her speech is not effected as she only has her dummy at bed time but she has had a stinker of a cold and has been asking but not getting it in the day. I have relented in the last few days a given her a bottle of milk or two in the day purely because she has been eating nothing and I figured I'd get some calories into her that way. But not too concerned about it as have done this before when she has been ill and she has been ok with not having them again when she is well. I have never compared myself to others too much before but just recently on FB all these women started posting loads about the big things that aer changing and I just kinda blind panicked. So thanks guys!

AnOtherName - I figured that. Surely the longer she is in there the better??? ie- more sleep for us?????

My DD is just 3 and still has a dummy at night, she only moved from her cot to a bed maybe 3 months ago - and only then because of building work we had to move the cot, and once we'd taken it apart we couldn't be bothered to put it back together!
I think there can be a lot of cmpetition, not necessarily overt, with a group of firstborns. Everyone gets a bit excited about moving to the next stage and it can lead to peer pressure.
DD is my DC3, I'm happy to go at her pace tbh, there's no real rush. If she's happy and developing fine, why worry?

depends on the kid but some do get out loads once they are in a bed and its a bit of a pain!

I would get a bed when she can climb out of the cot for safety reasons.
Getting rid of the dummy is more for speech and teeth development.
As far as the bottle is concerned I think that is about teeth/jaw development not sure though.

I would probably leave the dummy until all her teeth are through so she has something to comfort her during the night. You could change the bottle into the same drink in a cup/beaker.

If you celebrate Christmas then its a perfect time to get rid of dummy and bottles 'write' her a letter from Santa saying there aren't enough dummy/bottles at the NorthPole for all the baby reindeer and would she give them hers. leave them next to the plate with mince pies carrots etc for Santa to collect on Christmas eve.

My DD was 2 in September and still breastfeeds so uses that instead of a bottle/dummy and we still co-sleep most nights. I turned the cot into a bed at 15months as she could climb out of it/wouldn't go near the cot with a barge pole. Im trying to stop using beakers etc as want DD to use a cup but 9/10 times she spills the drink on the floor on purpose as she thinks its funny.

Hi OP. My 2.5 year old ds is still in his cot for now. We've bought a bed, just have to put it together but we're in no rush as like other posters have said he might get out of a bed during the night. Also dd is 6 weeks so we wanted to keep things the same for him for a little while. He stopped having a bottle at about 1 I think and uses a sippy cup for milk before bed. He never used a dummy so we haven't got that to worry about. Sounds like you are doing great. I don't think there's any rush to get to the next 'stages' with these things providing your dd is safe and happy.

Thanks so much guys. I just needed to hear that I'm not a nutty mummy! xxx