What to do with temper tantrummy 9 month old?

[tamula]

She is a good eater, gets enough sleep during the day and sleeps all night (why am I complaining I hear you ask!!) but she has just recently developed a real attitude!!

I know about development stuff and independence yadi yadi yah. but would love advice on as to how to handle her specific tantrum making self. Its over anything and everything.

I left her to cry for 3 mins the other day and the scene!! Red faced, tears and snot everywhere

I want the easy life back, any advice at all? I feel a bit of sap for even asking but I guess thats what we're all here for! (smile)

Cheers

Was going to say the same as Aviatrix...DD definitely had separation anxiety at this age. And was teething, come to think of it. Staying calm, giving reassurance and cuddles, and riding it out...

ps ref: easy life and advice - TBH, adjusting your own expectations! Makes it much less stressful for both of you, IME.

tamula, read your post with interest. I'm in a ball over my 7 month old. I started a post: Angry 7 month Old, this morning and am even more confused going to bed tonight. Just finished bawling my eyes out acctually.

i know how you feel tamula my little 1 is 15 months and she's the same,
ive to ignore her and tried to get on with what im doing,
ive tried time out but none of this seems to work either.
and its not attension cause she get alot of it from either us or crech.

Here's the thing: its not that what you are doing isn't working! It really, really isn't. Its just that babies do this stuff - they need to, they have to, they all do it, and it will pass. You can try doing this, that, or the other but IME acceptance is the key. I found getting some of my own needs met (not easy, I know) rather than needing dd to be different helped most.

think I just got on my first MN soapbox, down girl...

Thanks for all of your replies.

Sadeyedladyofthelowlands sorry your having a tough time, I guess we just have to wither through.Do you get support from a close friend or relative?

She gets all the love, care and attention in the world, but when we are not directly looking at or speaking to her (for that odd minute or so!) She lets us know about it.

I'll tell you something, I've been a nanny for 13 yrs and done a yr in midwifery before falling pregnant but nothing really prepares you for your own!!

I was jsut wondering if anyone was going through or had been through the same thing and did something that produced miraculous results, think i was being a bit silly

bigmouth were you biglips before?!!

'nothing really prepares you for your own!!'

So true!

Tamula-guess it is all relative. My DD is 15 months and has displays of temper when she cannot get what she wants-sometimes she bangs her head on our stone floor-I think it is really funny....compared with the rages her 4 year old brother flies into!

Tamula - No, am a brit living in Ireland, none of my family live here and in-laws are all 2hrs drive away. Have a friend who takes dd the odd time when I've been up all night and it's too much, but she had 4 kids of her own, can't ask for help too often.

How are you getting on anyway? Found the magic answer yet? If so PLEASE let me know!!!

Tamula, I completely understand.
Ds went through similar at 11 months -being a happy child, good eater, good sleeper.
This disappeared after a month.

Then re-appeared at 21 mths.

Can only suggest, just flowing with it.
We tried all the normal recommendations - saying this was 'not accceptable, 2 warnings then placed into travel cot, cuddling and explanation, ignoring the issue.

Like others have said, It passed. it's just a stage.
Hope that helps.

Thats RachD That is ver y helpful, at least I dont think its something I'm doing very wrong!

Sadeyedladyofthelowlands I symapthise and empathise totally, my mum died in 03 my dad in 00. When mum died the family suffered almighty fallout and nothings changed. I have no close family members that I would call on for even a supportive phone call

The in-laws are fab, they would have Ava all day every day if I let them but they live in a different country! Sods law!

She is actually improving at the moment, not sooo tantrummy but still madam-ish!! I just either ignore her, talk over her (not loudly), or give her 3 strikes and travel cot you go. Trying to not worry about it too much.

supposed to read.. thanks RachD

My dd seems better as the teeth pop thru but she's still waking 6-7 times a night and crying insanely until I cuddle her back to sleep. Most nights she's ended up in my bed just so I can get a few hours sleep. She's not in pain anymore from teething, just pissed off cos I'm not giving her the same ammount of cuddles and comfort as I was during the bad teething. Don't want to be a co-sleeping mum, I like the nights to myself.