Is this safe?

[cheeptrick]

Hello

Someone i know has a 6 month old baby and from 4 months started baby on solids, which is up to her. But i have reccently found out that she feeds the baby every two hours and then does not feed the baby from 7pm in the evening till 7 am in the morning. The baby is waking up 10 times in the night and she just puts the dummy back in and goes back to bed, so the baby does not have any food or milk for 12 hour.

Is this safe, not to feed/give milk for 12 hours at a time? The baby is ff and has stage 1 baby food, but she trys to feed him when he is spitting out the food and turning his head away every two hours during the day and then nothing at night.

Could this hurt the baby?

Sounds like a tough regime, but exactly like they did in the 50s and before, so I'm not sure that it would do physical damage, maybe psychological if the baby is left crying a lot at night.

Forcing the baby to eat is not going to do him any good. Why doesn't she just feed him at night, he would probably wake less then. Some people are thick and there's nothing you can really do about it.

My dcs slept through at 6 weeks and 11 weeks so they didn't get food for 12 hours or however long they slept they had dummies too and do wake up for them. it depends if the baby just goes back to sleep or is crying after being given the dummy.

It's not ideal, but it won't hurt the baby. It will probably give the child major food issues.

But, as SirHumphrey said, some people are thick.

I agree with south. If the baby goes straight back to sleep when given a dummy why would you wake the baby up to feed? My DD is 4 months and does occasionally go 12 hours without a bottle. She doesn't wake up any more hungry than usual and she's putting on weight. I thought you only really needed to feed them in the night if they cried?

The people nextdoor have complained about the baby crying at night and they are nursary teachers, so it sounds to me like the baby is not going back to sleep stright away and is crying.

I think the baby will have major food and sleep issues but the Mother is determined not to feed at night. The Mother has PND and was in a hospital ward for the first three months where the baby was taken off her at night for her to sleep and she claims that the baby slept thru and that the nurses did not feed the baby at night. So now she is home she has the baby in a different room and just puts the dummy in everytime the baby wakes up and then goes back to bed.

She has told me she wants 9 hours sleep and that the baby needs to learn to sleep thru the night.

We have suggested a milk feed at 11pm might help the baby sleep longer but she has said she tried that and it made no difference.

I guess i just want reassurance that the baby will be ok with this.

Also when my mum was looking after the baby for them He did not have a wet nappy from 8am till 4pm (he had first wet nappy change at 4pm). The mother feeds solids first and then milk and has said that the baby does not like milk or water and gives him juice instead.

If it was my son i would be worried about the lack of fluids but as it was a one off we do not know if this happens all the time or not.

I'd be more worried about the baby being in a different room and her already giving the baby solids as your not supposed to until they are 6 months.

No advice to give as I DD is my first and I'm still making it up as I go along. Hopefully someone will come along soon with some advice and possibly reassurance.

If you are really concerned, call the health visitor.
If the mother is suffering from PND then it may help her get the help she needs.

It wouldn't hurt the baby at all. Starting on solids at 4 months, although not ideal (with todays standards), it's been done for years and years and I've not heard of a baby die from it. You may possibly have been weaned as early, if not earlier than that yourself. I know I was weaned at 8 weeks!

At 6 months, a baby is capable of sleeping through the night without a feed and providing they're well fed in the day, should only really be waking for a bottle for comfort rather than because of hunger.

I would be concerned at how much time the baby is left crying for long periods though. But it does sound like she gets up when he cries so maybe doing some 'controlled' crying with him, which some parents do.

Everyone has their own way. Physically I'd say the baby will be fine. But I would possibly be concerned about the psychological effects if he's left crying for hours through the night.

4 months is fine, as is no food between 7 and 7 - so long as the child is happy, which it sounds like it isn't if it's waking 10 times a night.

At 6m my DS was only fed at 10 and then 7, but slept through. Feeding every 2 hours seems sensible if the child is hungry (and it sounds like this one isn't), although it probably makes more sense to spread it out a bit to build up an appetite. Even now my 14 month old DS eats at 7, 8.30, 12, 2.30, 6 and 7.

The child will be fine, but things could probably be better.

Thank you for the replies.

She is getting help from the MHN but i dont know about help with the baby.

At the end of the day its her child and i respect that but just not what was recommened with my baby so was not sure if the baby would be ok or not.

The baby will survive. It won't be as healthy, happy or thrive as much as if she was looking after it according to the best-practice recommendations. It may have problems in later life with food, sleep, digestive issues, depression and sustaining any kind of positive outlook on life, but it will survive. Unfortunately human beings are highly adaptable and can live through far-less-than-optimum conditions. Doesn't make for happy well-balanced adults, but it won't die.

Octaviapink - Yes i think you are right. We have suggested in a nice way what we would do or change and made suggestions when she has talked about it but she seems set on this way of raising her baby.