What do I need to teach DS1 before No2 comes along?

[robin3]

DS1 will be 2.5 when no 2 baby comes along. I have just under 6 months and am hoping to -

1. potty train
2. move DS1 to bigger (more exciting) bedroom
3. train off bedtime bottle (I know but it's only one a day and he gets his teeth brushed afterwards)

What other skills do I need to teach him so he feels less abandoned when baby comes and to help me as well?

Thoughts gratefully received.

I would say don't try to rush him into being potty-trained or wean him off his bedtime bottle before the baby comes - a new room's different though.

If he's ready for potty-training and to give up his bottle, so be it - if he's not, you'll have a battle and he'll be a cross boy.

I would be inclined to forget the potty training unless you're sure he's ready. The last thing you need os to have a child yelling "I need a poo!" when you're settling down to feed the baby. No matter how close you have the potty, you'll have to stop, help him with clothes and then wipe.

yes i agree that you shouldn't worry about potty training if he's not ready. I have two in nappies and hey it's not that bad.
same with the bottle. why make life difficult all round I say? let him have his nighttime comfort if he still wants it. he's going to have lots of changes in his life soon enough, why make more? and why make life more difficult for yourself than you have to?
I would say be kind to yourself and ds and don't try and force him to be a Big Boy if he's not ready, just enjoy your pregnancy and the last few months you have together as a twosome

dd1 was nearly 2 when dd2 was born and I didn't plan anything in advance!

My wise friends told me that she would probably regress anyway and want to be a 'baby' again etc so would want a bottle/nappy/cot.

So I didn't bother potty training - as I saw it, I would have enough on my plate without pee or poo all over the show as well. I did it when the first few months of newborn hell were over with.

I moved her into her 'big girls bed' when dd2 was about 3 months and ready for her cot. I used a moses then a travel cot for dd2 and left it a while until she moved into the vacated cot.

Bottle - can you get a new cup for him and make a huge deal out of it and get him to use that instead?

I would be very inclined to suggest "how to use the remote control", bad mother that I am. I am being flippant, but it is jolly useful when you're feeding the baby

Something I read on here and followed the advice. I got DS used to reading a book sat next to me on the settee/bed rather than actually on my lap and turning the pages himself. Then when the baby came I could read to him in the position he was used to and breast feed at the same time (would be same with bottle feeding I guess).

I also turfed him out of his pushchair. But I had a slightly bigger gap - he was 3.3 when she was born but hardly used the pushchair from 2 and a half.

Agree on the potty training views...going to give it a whirl but if it doesn't suit I won't push it. I don't find nappies a chore.

Thanks for all the suggestions....please keep them coming!

My main reason for asking is that he seems to love to be taught anything that results in praise (except giving up that bottle of course) so I'm grabbing the chance to encourage him whilst I can.

Tamum....he practises with the remote most days. As he's a boy I'm sure he'll soon have learnt to monopolise it's use!

Get him less and less used to you carrying him, assuming you still do this ocassionally.

One piece of advice I would give is not to introduce any major chances too near to baby's birth. If you are deciding on moving into a new bedroom, out of the cot into a big boys bed etc (particularly if the new baby is to have the old room and cot) do it several months in advance and allow ds to choose duvet cover decorations etc, so he doesn't feel he is being chucked out to make way for the baby iyswim.

Chicagomum....I agree that's why were starting now...hoping to make his new room really appealing and a place he can play and I can sit in when feeding baby.

we have a slightly smaller gap and did all of those things. Potty training was a big trauma so we gave that up and i had 2 in nappies(well 1 pull ups), agree that he would have regressed anyway.

Moved from cot to bed as soon as we could. proved to be too early for him and ended up taking him a long long time to settle and meant us having the cot AND the bed up in the room for a good 2 minths at least. I imagine its the same with mpoving rooms? Altho, if its all these big changes amnd u feel its too much for him why can he not stya in the room he is in?

some good points on here.
Agree re playing/reading independently.
Also putting on jamas, a good step towards dressing. My ds2 can dress himself completely and he's not 3 till April so this is not too early.
How is he at feeding? The more independence with this the better if you have a small baby.
And any "helpful" tasks, eg fetching baby's nappy, babygrow etc will be good to make him feel involved.

Another great piece of advice I was given before ds was born was to make dd a special box (with her help) of things to do when you are b'fing the baby (a couple of books, special toys, a video, that sort of thing). one thing that certainly helped with dd was involving her on choosing things for the baby - decorating the nursery, choosing clothes, also she sorted out her toy box to pass on "baby" toys she had grown out of, all making her feel more involved and reinforce the fact that she would play and important role when the baby came along as the "big sister".