Have I damaged my DD's confidence/attachment in me?

[LittleWaveyLines]

Couldn't find a safe place to park so had to drive for about 15mins with her inconsolably crying in her car seat in the back. I am worried I have inadvertantly CC with her as I couldn't cuddle her...

Will this hurt her attachment/confidence in my responses? She's 4 months...

Surely everyone has had to do this at some point? I'm sure she'll be fine.

Um, what else could you have done? No harm done - and I bet she got a big cuddle when you parked up .

No. She was stressed and crying but you were with her. She could hear you even if she couldn't see you. Knowing you were there makes an enormous difference in the stress levels of a baby.

She did indeed get a huge cuddle when I could park! Poor little chicken hadn't napped properly all day so was overtired...

Thank you Lovethesea - that's what I wanted to hear... I was singing and talking to her but kept worrying that all she knew was that her mummy wasn't holding her when she needed it.

I hate driving at the best of times, and have avoided going long distnaces with her for just this reason...

Awwww! I used to find that very stressful (being in the car while they screamed). I think the damage is only done if abies are continually ignored time and time again as they cry, not the odd once or twice though.
DS when aged about 18 months used to be tired on the way home from nursery and we'd be stuck in traffic and he'd be yelling and crying - was very stressful so I do sympathise.

I agree a one off won't make any difference at all!

Crikey we were stuck in crawling traffic on the motorway at about 5 months for about 45 minutes and not able to get out to console crying DD.

When we did manage to get off at a petrol station she was so very smiley when she saw us!

You won't have done any damage, she knew you were there.

D

A one-off won't have had a lasting effect. Physical contact as soon as you could manage it (unfortunately just being there, while better than not being there, isn't enough!) will have comforted her and reassured her. She'll be fine.

You can't be there always right away! When you have more than 1 child its impossible.

You sound like a very lovely mum.

You did meet her need - maybe not when YOU wanted to - but you did cuddle her.

Bless you. She'll be fine, I promise you.

You've reminded me how much I hated driving anywhere by myself when dd was a baby. She will be absolutely fine, but it has probably done your blood pressure no good.

DS (9 months) hates being strapped in his car seat so I avoid long journeys on my own as well. There have been a couple of occasions when I just had to continue driving and he cried himself to sleep, I felt awful! I am telling myself these are like drops in an ocean though, and as much as I try to, I can't always cuddle him the very moment he needs it. He didn't seem upset when he woke up and as far as I can tell his attachment to me is very strong, so I'm sure the odd crying episode is fine.

Thank you

I remember driving all the way back home from Holland when DS was about 18 months old. A customs strike at the tunnel at Calais meant we were queuing for ages & I couldn't take him out of his car seat either. When we got to the other side he decided that he'd had far too long in the car and screamed all the way from Folkestone home... 2 hours!!!

He was fine the next day. My nerves were shot, though. :) There are worse things you can do to your baby than leave them crying