Dealing with Multiple Upheavals

[Fantail]

What would you do?

My DD used to be a good sleeper. Would settle reasonably well (bfed, rocked or cuddled, and sometime self-settled) and slept through from 5 months.

At 6 months we went away for 10 days and she started waking once for a feed, no problem was clearly a growth spurt, given how much she grew. She slept through again a handful of times once we were home.

Since then it has been one thing after another and her sleep and ability to settle to go to sleep at night has got progressively worse and worse. After the growth spurt came a cold, then an ear infection, then cutting her first two teeth, then her father was in hospital for almost 3 weeks. To top it all off we are moving from the UK to NZ and leaving in 2 weeks time.

I know that 8 months is a prime sleep regression time, plus a growth spurt, plus a developmental leap, plus separation anxiety starting.

Before her Dad was discharged from hospital she was finally back to sleeping through with minimal fuss with settling then waking once or perhaps twice and either being cuddled back to sleep quickly or having a quick feed as she was clearly hungry. Sometimes she slept with me in the bed - purely because I was (am) so exhusted.

Since her Dad was discharged it has got worse and worse. She woke every 2 hours last night, is taking a good hour or more to settle properly (after sleeping about 40 minutes first).

I have never done any sleep training with her, I have never really needed to and I don't think that I can given all the changes in her little life at the moment.

But I do need some advice on how to cope! How much do you think our move and her Dad being in hospital is affecting her? I am so worried that she is going to be physciologically damaged in some way - but then I am also worried that me not getting enough sleep is damaging in that I have less patience and energy for her. I am not adverse to co-sleeping, but I am not sure whether it is a good solution given that we will have quite a few temporary sleeping arrangements over the next month or so.

Help!

I think the best think you can do is respond to her needs at the moment - you're going to be her rock over the next weeks and months and I really wouldn't worry about the sleeping through. It's probably not going to happen again for a while. Just be there for her when she wakes in the night (the taking-ages-to-settle thing will probably go soon) and you'll be doing what she needs.

Hi, I agree with Octaviapink, plus I would suggest thinking about co-sleeping, if you are not averse, might be a good idea if many changes expected in future as then she will always have you so likely to feel more secure.

My son had a very unsettled first year, he was ill a lot/hospitalised/housemoves and we had to accept that was how it was - once life settled he did too. Whilst he was sleeping badly me and DH just had to go to bed as early as poss and get all the sleep we could. It is really hard from 6 months on due to teething, developmental changes and generally increasing awareness.

Best of luck with your move and hope your DP ok.