3 under 4 and terrified!

[BreeVanDerTramp]

Have just found out I am expecting our 3rd DC (planned pregnancy) but I am now worried sick. DS1 is almost 4 and DS2 is 13 months, will be 4.5 and 21 months when new baby arrives.

I am worried about DS1 being left out as the younger two will be close in age and will have 3 years at home together while DS1 is at school.

I am worried that DS2 will never had anytime 'just for him' as had always imagined that we would have a year together when DS1 started school before having anymore children.

I am worried I won't be able to BF and give DC3 the attention he/she will need as I will have a young toddler and a pre-schooler to look after. DS1 will be starting school two months after DC3 is due.

I am also excited and know it will be fine, just didn't imagine I would fall pregnant straight away as other two were a couple of years in the making!

When DD3 came along DD1 was 4.5 and DD2 was 18 months. I was dreading it, especially with how to cope with an 18mo and a newborn and of course how to ensure they all get attention and don't feel left out. But really it's not as bad as you think it'll be, it's definitely a lot more and DD2 is a challenge but now DD3 is 7 months and I feel like I'm over the worst of it. The thing with newborns is you really just have to meet their needs, they don't demand as much attention as toddlers so you can feeding the baby while directing the toddler in whatever they are doing or if your toddler is anything like mine, having baby on one knee and toddler on the other. It's tough but great!

I had 4 aged 4 and younger.
DD1 8 1/2yrs
DD2 4yrs 1mth
DD2 2yrs 5mths
DS1 13mths
DS2 newborn.
It's hard work but manageable. I was like a swan. Calm on the surface but legs going like crazy underneath.
Compared to now, 7 yrs on, back then was easy.

mine were 19 months and 31 months when dc3 was born. she suffered a birth injury though and has cp as a result, so life was a bit chaotic with 3 under 3 and the baby having brain damage and a gazillion appointments every week.

you'll cope. just don't expect to drink a hot cup of tea for the next two years.

I bow down to your greatness and hope I sound as confident in a years time !

niamh I suppose you are right, newborns just need to be fed and changed, they don't look for too much attention

disco if we survive to 7 years I will let you know

madwoman I have no idea how you managed to get 3 out of the house for hospital appointments, I suppose you just have to do what needs doing.

Loopy DS1 at pre-school 3 days a week so will make sure I spend this time with DS2 instead of running errands. Can't do slings have massive boobs and they really hurt my back but might try a few again.

Thanks everyone! We will just have to take it a day at a time.

to whoever said no tea for two years, i beg to differ.... brew some in the morning and make a big flask of it to sip through the day!!! a lifesaver in the park in winter!

no one can hear us

36H here, you must tell me the sling secrets, have tried Tomy Freestyle and Babasling both caused agony across top of my back

congratulations!!!
i wouldnt worry too much about the 3 under 4 thing, try to look at the positives instead like they all get to grow up close in age and hopefully be close and good friends to each other and will be in a similar stage to each other as they grow up, so it is a good thing really.
my 3 are all under 4, and were just about a month off being 3 under 3 when dc3 was born but its going ok so far (ds3 not 3 months yet so still early on). i do worry the same about my ds2, as what you mentioned but he is a really happy boy and he will get more time once ds1 is in nursery at least, as yours will when your ds1 is in school. ok so they have a baby sibling there but being the older one and the one who can talk more, they will still get a lot of attention. as for bf, my 3rd is the only one who ended up exclusively bf so far! i did think will be hard to sit & feed for ages with the other two to entertain but its just worked out fine, so you never know
you know with your 2nd you probably worried the same about going from 1 to 2? but probs managed ok? i think its just the same with 3. i worried about my older ones both times, with jealosy etc and both times worked out ok but i think you just cant help but worry a bit just in case!

so which puschair are you all looking at???
I am assuming most of you will need a double (i will!)

Hated my P&T so im thinking about baby jogger...

Loopy thanks, a few good suggestions there to reasearch!

Firawla DS2 is adorable and gets loads of attention from everyone for being so cute so I think he will be fine and I guess I did worry going from 1 to 2, am feeling slightly calmer now!

tostaky I have been having a look, must admit to loving the Bugaboo Donkey but it is rather pricey. I would like one with a carrycot for newborn - what have you seen so far?

Bree - i have not seen anything yet as i am only 10 weeks. but I have posted this thread which may be of interest to you www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pushchair_chat/1328645-Three-kids-under-4-will-I-need-a-double-pushchair

The Donkey looks nice but as with all Bugaboo is likely to be very £££!!!
I need something light and that folds small. I will go to see more puschair once ive had my scan and know for sure it is not triplets or twins!!

Will have to bookmark your thread for after my scan, I think I would collapse with shock if it was twins !