why is my ds such a nighmare at the moment?

[boglach]

It just seems like everyone copes so well and their kids are delightful

My ds has just started school and it is terrible at the moment. He scowls at me when he comes out of school, where as I see other boys run up to their mums and hug them. He snipes at me all the way home, then at home it is like walking on egg shells with bad temper, silly behaviour and cheek

I am so sick of being a mum right now

It may be that he's saving up the day's frustrations and upsets to splurge on you - you're the person in his life that he knows will love him whatever, so he's in safe territory. He's on his best behaviour (or probably trying his hardest) all day and needs to let off steam. Perhaps some extra together-time as a response might change things, rather than getting cross and frustrated with him (a perfectly normal and understandable response!)

All 4 of mine were evil bastard children from hell when they first started school. Really, really horrible. School is knackering - long days, you have to focus all the time, loads of stuff going on, changes to routines etc. And 4 year old boys are also notoriously hard work - they get a testosterone surge or something (I'm guessing he's 4).

Pick your battles - let minor things which you know are just down to tiredness slide, but zero tolerance for the big stuff. It gets better - they do get used to it, I promise.

Standard for post school 4 yo boys ime. Lasted the whole of the first year with ds1.

oh thanks! Your replies have helped so much

He is actually 5 (scotland). I just feel things have changed so much since he went to school. Yes some together-time might help but I find at the weekends he is very into his daddy. I will try though. We used to bake together and read a lot, but since school we have less time (I have a 2 year old as well).

This is why I love mumsnet, you do realise you aren't the only one

always feed them straight away. That helps, I find. And don't try and talk about things straight away, just let him be - til the food kicks in, anyway!

^^^Agree with 'feed them'. Take something with you to the school gates like a cereal bar or something else 'quick fix energy'. Low blood sugars and tiredness major contributors to grumpiness in children.

When my DS just started school his teacher stopped me one afternoon and asked did he get much sleep at home. He was a 12 hours straight kind of kid so the question surprised me. Reason she asked was that when they had story-time in the afternoons on the carpet, DS would often curl up in a ball and go to sleep!!!

Good luck

I actually came onto Mumsnet this evening wondering the self same question for the same reason. DS is only child and until now we've been very close and aside from fussy eating I would say he's pretty good. Until school in Sept. Took me nearly 5 years to get him how I wanted and all over in 2 weeks! I'm really not enjoying being with him now and we're both finding that hard - vicious circle really. Thank you for showing me its normal so we can muddle through it and back to the good times - as you will too. (Hope its less than a year ...)!

My DD is being a right royal PITA too at the moment. Scowling, grumpy, hitting & generally not very nice.

I am going with ignoring the bad and praising the good which makes our time together more bearable as i am not telling her off all the time. I am hoping things settle very soon.