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Original poster

Please tell me everything great about having (only) 2 kids!

21 replies

moonwalk · 16/10/2011 17:25

I have the number "3" etched into my brain. (As in "having 3 kids").

Really trying to make myself see all the positives of having only 2 kids.

Please help :-)

OP posts:
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ASuitableGirl · 16/10/2011 17:38

I have two hands :)

ellesabe · 16/10/2011 18:11

A lot of foods come in packs of 4.

SHRIIIEEEKPoolingBearBlood · 16/10/2011 18:13

What would be the issue with having 3?

Assuming you already have two - your chances of sleeping through the night and not changing nappies are either here or drawing ever nearer.

What car do you have?

If you're handing uniform down it will be OK for #2, likely to be wrecked by #3
(scrapes bottom of barrel)

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rosycheeksandasmile · 16/10/2011 20:15

You would be outnumbered Grin but in a nice way with 3!

Katisha · 16/10/2011 20:17

Holidays will start getting v expensive with more than 2.

Bunbaker · 16/10/2011 20:25

Family rooms usually only sleep 4
You will have less money
You will be short of sleep
You will get fed up of taking children to soft play parties for the umpteenth time
You will run yourself ragged taking the children to various after school activities
Some cars won't accept three booster seats across the back seat
Unless you buy a big car you won't be able to give lifts to your children's friends
You won't get any "me time" for years

25goingon95 · 17/10/2011 12:49

Im in the same boat OP. The things i have thought up for my family are:

  • we would have to get a bigger car, 3 seats won't fit in the back. Also wouldn't be able to drive DCs friends around which would upset them!
  • It is easy to food shop for 4 of us. To add another would be expensive.
  • we have only just got our DC sleeping through together and so we are enjoying some unbroken sleep for the first time in nearly 6 years!
  • We are looking forward to when we can go as a family to the cinema or alton towers. Having another baby would mean one of us left out with the baby.
  • We will have the chance to go on holidays abroad because we will be able to afford it.
  • We will be able to spoil the two we have got :)
  • we can get a puppy which we all really want, next year :)
  • we will be able to afford swimming lessons for DD2 like DD1 is having, and other after school activities for both.
  • we will have more time for both DDs and also for ourselves.
lovechoc · 18/10/2011 21:06

Three is an odd number (IMO). With two children, life is much easier.

You have two knees, one for each child to sit on when reading bed time stories.

Holidays simple, you can book many cheap holidays for.......families of 4. Not so easy if you have more than 2 children, it just gets pricier.

There's the car issue aswell. Already been mentioned.

And then the so called 'middle child syndrome' - according to DH (who was one of three) there's always one gets left out as they all grow up (even if both parents treated everyone equally growing up doesn't mean that the three children don't sometimes leave each other out when playing).

You have to go back to the sleepless nights if you have another baby, and feel like you're never getting out the bit. Back to nappies, lack of social life, etc.

So many more reasons not to have any more than two children IMO.

mindgone · 18/10/2011 21:49

I find 2 teenagers enough! Also, things get so expensive as they get older, esp school things like trips! They are generally lovely, but when they're bigger than you, with attitude, it's not so lovely! Apparently, the single best thing you can do for the planet is to have less children!! I used to really want more, but DH didn't, now very happy with the 2, and can definitely see more and more advantages as they get older. You can give a lot more attention to two, and these days, they really need it!

strictlovingmum · 18/10/2011 22:13

Two is a perfect even number Grin.
I agree with mindgone, little children tend to grow into the big children with attitude very quickly, and it is easier to menage two rather then three, also cheaper.
We have two and we are happy with our lot, unlike you I never wanted three so my situation is perfect for me, we have a large gap between the DC (11 years) and for a long time we were thinking we will only have one, but when DD came along we were delighted, but also knew there and then two was enough for us.
I am not natural and it took me a long time to admit it to myself, motherhood was something I had to learn like a task, and based on that IMO for me was good to stay on two, but I have few friends who have three and four, and they are so good at it, that sometimes I feel such women should ten kidsGrin.
Not me I am tad too selfish of my freedom and absolutely not prepared for any more sleepless nights.Smile

Gemzooks · 20/10/2011 22:40

I have a lovely DS (5) and DD (2.5), have that niggling 'what about a third' feeling, but tell myself the following:

  • I'm not getting any younger
  • we're programmed to want more, doesn't mean you should
  • I got really knackered and fed up in the breastfeeding, sleepless nights stage
  • I have a boy and a girl so no feelings of wanted another gender
  • I really need to have a career and 2 kids already makes it hard
  • I want to have the resources in case one of them has a talent that needs funding, or has a problem and needs special teaching, facilities etc.
  • You can leave 2 kids with grandparents. 3, I don't know
  • one kid per adult.
  • couldn't imagine how I would ever have one on one time with them
  • don't think going through another preg, birth, would be good for my body or my marriage

The fundamental one though is that giving 2 kids the attention they need, to my mind, is already almost more than I can handle!!!!

2kidsintow · 22/10/2011 13:02

I love having two and think it is the right number for us.
I have two hands to hold theirs.
I had two knees when they were little to have them both sit on my lap.
I have two arms to put around them as they snuggle up to me now they are a bit old to fit on my knee.

There are two of us to look after two of them and give them one-to-one time easily. Ever remembering sitting at a park watching a couple with three kids under 5. Both of the parents were dedicatedly watching the one they had close to them. Each of them was calling out to the other to watch the third child who was basically unattended and allowed to run amok through the park. .

ben5 · 22/10/2011 13:10

all the above! I have 2 hands , 2 knees , a car that suits the 4 of us( dh me +2kids). Also ds2 has had heart problems and is austic and I really don't think I could have another child that might also have problems! 2 children is cheaper. I don't even want a girl I love my boys!

Itsjustafleshwound · 22/10/2011 13:15

Just think - everything you and your partner has is divided by two - if you have a third, your children only get a 1/3 if you have another child.

Two keeps me busy enough ...

BeyondLimitsOfTheLivingDead · 22/10/2011 19:41

They'll either be friends or enemies.
But at least you won't have two ganging up on the other one...

Plus all of the above [hgrin]

CocoPopsAddict · 22/10/2011 23:32

I have just the one sister, and we are close as close. There is something special about being one of only two - there's only one other person in the world who you really shared your childhood with.

nonicknamemum · 23/10/2011 00:26

If you have a 3 bedroom house and no desire/money to move, 2 children = a bedroom each, 3 = a shared room. In particular, if you currently have one boy, one girl there is an approx 50/50 chance that no.3 will be the same gender as older child, so you either have a boy and a girl sharing a room (might be fine now, but will it still feel fine once they are teenagers?) or the two sharing have a big age gap and completely different bedtimes.

I know someone who decided to go for a third and they got twins. Would you be able to cope if you ended up with four, or would you then wish you had stopped at two?

gaelicsheep · 23/10/2011 01:08

You are very lucky to have 2 healthy kids. Why run the risk of upsetting the apple cart?

2or3 · 04/01/2012 11:24

Why only have two?

A friend I talked to really hit the nail on the head with her detached viewpoint: "your life is perfect, what else do you want? It is time for you to be egoistical, focus on yourself, put the energy in yourself, your relationship and your career". Her attitude seems soooooo sensible. And I think many, many women have this attitude.

Well, all of the Ladies who make the decision to stop at 2.
Am struggling with this as well.

startail · 04/01/2012 11:47

They have a bedroom each.
They fit in a standard car and there is still room for a friend each.
They are close enough in age to play together. Three's a crowd.
DD2 has various 3 people play dates that ought to work, they don't.
Premier inn and family rooms in Mallorca fit 4. You don't have to upgrade your hire car.
You can lift your luggage, just.
If you are lucky you can afford food, clothes and after-school clubs for them.
When they are little you have a hand for them both when your out.
Now they are bigger they'll sit each side if me to watch a film,
Most of all my two are so different and give and take from their father and I such different things our family feels complete.

startail · 04/01/2012 11:52

You'll have to survive Jolly phonics and Biff, Chip and Floopy againGrin

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