phobia of toddler groups!

[headspin25]

Hey, as the title indicates I have an unhealthy phobia of toddler groups! I have recently moved to a brand new area and I do feel a tad isolated and I know that going to these groups will help, but embarassingly so I am so scared about walking into a room full of people I don't know and having to use my social skills again, which have some what disappeared since having my ds 14 months ago! I feel like when i talk to people now I go bright red and stammer quite abit! I am scared about feeling awkward god i sound so pathetic! I used to be so confident and full of life! Any tips for confidence building with regards to meeting other mums or positive toddler group experiences would be very much appreciated! Thanks x

Hi!

Don't beat yourself up about that, it's a normal feeling.

Where did you move to? Maybe you could do a search in MN local to see if there is anyone in your area.

Basically, just think about it in terms of:- you're going to toddler groups for your DC, not for you. Just go in, let DC play and in time you will get talking to people.

I am a bit shy at toddler groups too, my DS is 19 months old and since having him I've been a SAHM and have forgotten how to talk to adults!

Talk to the leaders as they will know local facilities and events and they will have an idea of who other mums are and may be able to do a bit of an ice-breaker between you and a similar mum.

HTH!

I'm not keen either, but the more you go, the better it gets. Honestly.

I couldn't imagine anything worse, therefore I've never been to one.

Email the leaders before you go to confirm start/finish times etc... that way when you turn up as a newbie the leaders will know you and should do some introductions. I went to a new group last week - I only really got to talk to the leaders but hoping when I go back again that it won't be so busy and I will get to talk to some other mums. Bloody nerve racking though :)

I'm not very good at them either, finding keeping an eye on ds and trying to have a full conversation a little tricky sometimes! It does get easier though.

Find out the number of the group you want to attend, phone the group leader and tell her your problem. She will be happy to meet you and introduce you to one or two other mums at the group. Go on, you know you want to.

If its still hard, make the arrangements and then when you get there say 'i can only stay for half an hour this time as i have an appointment', then you have a get out, but you've broken the ice.

i think if you push yourself and go it will help you get to know a lot of people in your new area, and you may really benefit from it. at first it can be daunting if you dont know anyone but it can be normal to be like that so noone will really judge you for being shy and once you go a few times you will get to know people.
if you want positive experiences i love my toddler groups they are really friendly, i went thru a more shy phase aswel after having my 1st ds i didnt go out to any groups or anything til he was about 1 then i started going alot. now i am there all the time because it keeps my kids busy & they love it. i wouldnt say i am shy at all anymore cos im always out and talking to people and got to know many local people which is nice, you feel part of the community then rather than walking down the street and never recognise anyone.
i am having to move to a new area soon too but definitely i will try to go toddler groups there too cos its a really easy way to meet people and its quite horrible to feel you dont know anyone locally. the awkward new dont know anyone thing is not great but to me its worth going and just get past that