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Parenting

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Original poster

Dummy Help

16 replies

Hywel · 05/12/2005 12:25

Please can anyone help? My dd is 7 months old and is very reliant on her dummy to fall asleep. When it falls out she crys for it back and on a bad night this can mean putting it back in up to 20 times. I know that it may mean going cold turkey with her but I could really do with some help and advise.
Has anyone else had this problem and how many nights of crying did it take before the dependancy was broken?
Thanks x

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Original poster

Hywel · 05/12/2005 12:25

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HappyDaddy · 05/12/2005 12:28

My 18month old still has her dummy. It's not so bad.

peachandpear · 05/12/2005 14:06

had same withDS1. Got fed up as u say with having to keep getting up to put dummy in. at 8 months we stopped feeding in night and went cold turkey with dummy. took 3 nights of controlled crying. was hell but it worked with him. 1st night is the worse!

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AlmostAChristmasAngel · 05/12/2005 14:09

tell her santa has a new baby reindeer that hasnt got a dummy and get her to pot it in a envelope and leave it near the fireplace....maybe leave a liite prezzie from santa [teddy] and a thank you note...

AlmostAChristmasAngel · 05/12/2005 14:09

oops sorry didnt see age

Elibean · 05/12/2005 15:11

We went cold turkey at six months...I felt dreadful for a couple of nights, but it was really very quick! DD went back to sleeping through and never looked back - I only needed a hundred extra therapy hours . I did do a gentler version than CC though, not letting her grieve for her dummy alone - because she was sooo little. I did pick up/put down (aka Baby Whisperer).

Original poster

Hywel · 05/12/2005 15:58

Elibean,
Did your DD stop crying with pick up put down? Because my fear is she will not want a cuddle just a dummy. How did you find it?
Please be honest how dreadful was it and how long time wise did it take? I don't think I can stand longer than 1 hour of crying without breaking. Also did she continue to wake throughout the night crying for a few night. Sorry so many questions
Thanks x

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merrymarchhare · 05/12/2005 16:01

You could just do CC or PUPD without getting rid of the dummy.

Original poster

Hywel · 05/12/2005 16:04

Do you mean give it her to fall asleep with and then not give it back. Use CC or pu/pd in the night?

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thecattleareALOHing · 05/12/2005 16:09

I used a dummy clip so ds could always find it in the night and put in back in himself.

merrymarchhare · 05/12/2005 16:09

Yes, we did this with DS and it worked a treat, he would find his dummy again and eventually go back off to sleep. I think a lot of it will be down to the fact that she will be used to you soothing her back to sleep and just shouts for you out of habit.

rummum · 05/12/2005 16:10

my kids were 3 and a half when they got rid of theirs.... but they only had it at night from the age of about 2 and a half. I never had any trouble getting them to bed or sleeping, and when we got rid of them father xmas came and took them (the week before xmas) and gave them to a baby that needed it... he also left a special toy... they both new he was coming to take it away, cried for an hour the first night... then accepted it was gone and never asked for it again...

the waking up in the night because they can't find it doesn't last that long...

with hindsight we could have got rid of it earlier but it was a comfort for them...

my friends son sucked his thumb and at 10 he still did it at night and now needs a brace!

Original poster

Hywel · 06/12/2005 09:15

Well we did it! Started last night and didn't give dd her dummy to fall asleep. To say it was unplesant was an under statement, she cried for 45min, dh stayed with her (I wasn't strong enough)rubbing her back. The only saving grace was her cry was more frustration than upset and she didn't shed a single tear. She then stayed in dreamland without a stir until 1am, then she cried for over 1 hour. I ended up cuddling her back to sleep (I know this is a no no but she did fall asleep without her dummy, so I felt a small triumph). She then stirred at 4.30 and cried for 10 mins and fall back asleep without a whimper at her 6.30 feed. Not really looking forward to her naps today, however we need to stick with it now or all the crying was for nothing. Will it get better today and have a made a rod for my own back cuddling her to sleep? Is it me or as a mother are yor always worrying about doing the right thing?
Thanks for listening x

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trolleyshoeloose · 06/12/2005 09:29

WELL DONE YOU!!!! . Keep at it, sounds like it is going to pay off. I shouldn't think cuddling her last night will have caused major problems. May just take a little bit longer to crack it thats all IMO. You have to do what works for you. Maybe tonight try not to do the cuddling thing and see what happens. She may surprise you! I worry all the time if I am doing the right thing! In fact I think I spoilt the early days with mine worrying 'should I cuddle? shouldn't I cuddle? should I pick up? shouldn't I pick up?!'

merrymarchhare · 06/12/2005 14:23

Well done and it doesnt stop when they're 18 either, according to my mother.

Original poster

Hywel · 11/12/2005 19:11

All going well so far. The second night was a doddle, dd fed for 20 mins I put her in the cot and she didn't make a sound, fall fast asleep as though she has never had a dummy at all. It has been like that ever since, if she stirs in the night we just rub her back and she drops off again. But rubbing her back is a dream in comparison to running up and down stairs all night, then lying with your arm through the rung of the cot in anticipation of dummy drop! Naps are still a little difficult she cries for about 5-10mins before dropping off to sleep. I am hoping that this improves soon. As anyone else had this problem, when night time is easy but naps are a bit of a battle of wills?

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