DD10 has had a 50:50 care arrangement between her dad and I (1 week each) since we separated/divorced 2 years ago.
It is, at times, very frustrating, and as DD gets older, the tension is beginning to impact on her, despite my best efforts to keep her out of it.
I live next door to her school, so she comes to me every day after school, even during the weeks she is living with her Dad, and he picks her up from here after he finishes work a couple of hours later. He works nearby but lives a 20 minute drive away.
Last week, exH sends me an email, telling me that on Wednesday of this week (his week), he would be picking DD up straight from school to take her to the dentist. Fine by me, thanks for letting me know.
When DD arrived this afternoon, we were making plans about when she was going to bake/ice end of term cakes for her teachers, and I said, "oh, we can't do it Wednesday, cos you won't be here". She didn't know.
Am I wrong in thinking that as she gets older, her Dad should let her know about these changes as well as me? I couldn't anwer any of her questions once I'd told her; what time? where? who with? All I knew was that she wasn't coming!
Has anyone got a similar arrangement - how do you manage with older DC's who may make their own (provisional) plans for their time, even if it's only in their head?