is it time for hardcore potty training yet??????

[carlychristmas]

i posted recently and would like more advice my ds is 3 and he is still not toilet trained. I have tried everything and am at my wits end! i have been thinking about just putting him in pants and letting him wet himself just so he knows when he has gone and maybe know when he is about to go and tell me. the only problem with this apart from the obvious of being constantly cleaning him up is that i think doing this makes me sound a bit like a monster and cruel mummy which im not. does anyone have any experience of this that they could share and tell me that there is some light at the end of the tunnel

isn't that what you do anyway? Actually with ds2 he was interested which is why I did it (he was not quite 2) but ds1 it was all our idea really.
Will yr ds1 be willing to wear pants/sit on loo etc? What have you done WRT to potty training? Why not try it - he might well surprise you. From anecdotal experience of others it's often a lot easier and quicker if the child is older when trained.

No - "cold turkey" in pants is the only way to go with potty training IMO. 3 is still young though so don't worry too much. Give him 3 days and see if he makes any progress. If not, then give up for a month and try again. If he does make some progress, give him longer - DS2 was right on his 2 week limit and I was ready to crack when he finally got it.

Have to say that we went to pullups in between training attempts with dSs simply so we weren't going right back to nappies - if they asked to go then we could pull them down like pants. I don't think they're any good for proper training though.

thanks for your messages, its really harde to understand him cos if i put him on the toilet before bed as part of bedtime routine he will go (btw he flatly refuses to use the potty thats why he is straight on the toilet) but any other time of day he wont go. I use huggies pull ups but i think they feel too much like nappies to him so thats why im hoping he will hate the sensation of being wet and start to know before he goes in stead of afterwards

I tried with DD1 umpteen times. I started in the summer thinking that the weather would smehow encourage her (and she was 2 1/2). THis came to nothing so I left it and tried again, and again and again. Pant days, no going out etc etc.

Despair set in and I had visions of her going to pre-school in nappies.

Three came and went and then I tried again and bingo. At least as she was older I could discuss it with her and tell her about big girls wearing pants.
The time was right for her (the coldest part of the winter) and we got the bonus of dry nights too. She came to love her potty and still sometimes drags it out at nearly 5!

So little advice I'afraid but lots of heartfelt positve vibes.

Have the "Big Boy" chat before hand and explain exactly what will be required of him. Maybe set up a reward scheme (stickers etc).

And expect lots of wet clothes and puddles...

if you want to train him you are going to have to ditch the pull-ups. Choose a few days when you haven't much on and be prepared to give it your sole concentration. I don't see why it makes you a monster mummy - loads and loads of people potty train in this way, I certainly did. Also none of us wore pull-ups did we?

the thing is at he risk of sounding cruel he is a little slow so although he could understand a simple command as go get mummy your shoes he wouldnt understand the concept of a sticker chart. But i have been brave and this afternoon i went out and bought ten pairs of cheap pants!
HARDCORE POTTY TRAINING HERE I COME!!!!! [GRIN][GRIN][GRIN]

sorry that was supposed to be

He's 3 so he's probably got as much understanding as my DS had when I trained him at 2.2. And some level of control if he will go at bedtime.

he has some element of control cos he can obviously either wait a little of force one out @ bedtime. But he still wakes up with a sodden nappy and i limit his drinks from four onwards so dont understand that??!!

Don't worry about night time. Lots of kids take AT LEAST a year or two to get nighttime cracked. Don't limit drinks as it is unfair. Daytime is different. You have to 'have the chat first' then put him in pants - agree the day you will start with him. Then put him in pants, if poss just pants! then keep asking him every 20 mins or so. Take him to the loo every hour or so. Expect nothing, but is you get a sucess on day 1 - praise him loads. Same again say 2, loads of reminding and taking him. By day three keep reminding him and taking him, but stretch it out a bit.

My dd took about 1 week to get things going, and 2 weeks to crack it. She had 10 accidents and NO SUCESS on day 1! She was under 2. But was ready as she was always telling us she had wet her nappy

Crunchie is right. Don't even think about nighttime yet. Try the day and see what happens. I just but that bit because it sounded to me like he is ready for daytime training.

well he is now wearing his pants although how many times ill end up changing them b4 bed is anyones guess thanks for all your advice i will keep you posted

So how's it going carly?

i am amazed! i put his pants on yesterday and although he let out a few drops he went three times on the potty and today he has been in them all day except for one little incident where he wasnt sat on the potty properley he has been dry. Saying that though im not getting my hopes up just yet still have to master poohing not looking forward to cleaning that one up!

carly that's fab!
Well worth waiting till he was ready.

well i knew i spoke too soon, after i posted he poohed himself and then while i was trying to change him and clean him up he peed all over me and the floor and today he is not interested will keep going though

carly pooh in pants is very common at first. DD did it for a fortnight even tho she was totally dry.
Keep at it, sounds like a good start!