sick of my DD pulling her dummy out every 2 mins then screaming for it back?

[sweetuphoria]

I've posted about this before when she started doing it at about 12 wks old. Now she is 20 wks and still doing it. Nap times had got much easier since she started having a dummy at 8wks but now they are such a palaver because she cannot keep her hands away from the dummy and I am constantly putting it back in for at least half an hour before I finally give in and just swaddle her. I has previously weaned her from swaddling as I think she's getting too old for it but now were back to where we were, so frustrating.

Last week I tried to ditch the dummy with pick up put down but it does not work with her (was trying for an hour and a half til I finally gave in and gave her her dummy).

Does anyone know why she is doing this? It can't be.a phase as she's been doing it for ages. I am going back to work next week part time and need to get this sorted because my MIL will be looking after her and she is becoming a nightmare at every nap time.

Any advice welcome

many children do this

I advise throwing them all in the bin. In a few days she will have forgotten all about them, and wont "need" them anymore

My baby does this too, she is nearly 20 weeks, i just keep putting it in until she settles, i think it's because she wants me with her to go to sleep as sometimes when i put the dummy in she holds on to my arm.

She only does this with me, not DH, after he puts her down she just settles herself so It may be that she will behave differently for your MIL.

I know that she doesn't really "need" the dummy but TBH it helps me, especially when her teeth hurt and when i'm making her food it stops her wailing, so i "need" her to have the dummy for the time being.

Yeah I agree it does help when they have a dummy smoggii. I've never really liked them but when I let her have one at 8wks it was a godsend cos she started napping much better.

That was until she started doing this. I didn't mind at first but she seems to be getting worse with it (she does it with DH too) . I also worry that she has become too attached to it and I hear that this attachment gets even worse as they get older.

Just wondering why swaddling her is a problem? I did bin all dummies at this point, as they caused more hassle in the end. Mine were swaddled up to around the 6 month stage, when they wriggled out of the wrap themselves.

I actually think swaddling is great, she sleeps brilliantly in the swaddle but have heard that you should stop it around 3-4mo (not even sure the reason why). Did yours struggle to settle once they weren't swaddled anymore at 6mo?

No, they didn't struggle at all, because they did it themselves, really! They let me know that they wanted more movement. Ignore the 'shoulds' and go with your instinct and what your baby tells you. Especially if it means the dummy can go. :)

I swaddled both my girls who slept soundly and never had dummies. I don't remember it being a issue or something I felt strongly about I just didn't buy any. Babies and toddlers I know tend to cry for the dummy because they're used to having it so to my mind they do seem to be more hassle than they are worth.

Thanks thevisitor and DurhamDurham - I think I will continue swaddling then, and will think about ditching the dummy although that's not gonna be easy!

Good Luck!

My DD wouldn't be swaddled after the first couple of weeks!

Best of luck!

I swaddled my 3 children like TheVisitor till about 6 months and they could wriggle free. By that point they were much more settled about sleeping anyway. All had/have dummies until 2. They were a godsend on many an ocassion and despite having doubts with my first one, I have never regretted using dummies. Took them away once they reached 2 and never had any problem with stopping the dummy. If I was you I'd keep swaddling and dummy. Esp if you going back to work as it is a comfort item so it might make the transition smoother? Hope it all works out for you.

DS2 did this too, he is now 5 months and has discovered his thumb, which is much better at night-time and he settles himself to sleep,but he still likes the dummy when we are out and about in his pushchair and pulls it out but can just about put it back in now, sometimes it falls out and lays on his chest and he licks it like a lolly .

Thanks Solola and shuffleballchange - like I said the dummy has been great in the past but know so many people who have to get up like 10 times in a night to replace it, so I'm not looking forward to the inevitably of that.

But didn't have the heart to take it away from her - she is now currently fast asleep in a swaddle (had a dummy in but had now ditched it)! :)

I swaddled DS till 5.5 m.o. when he started screaming when I went to wrap him up. That was the point at which he could nap for more than 10 minutes without waving his hands and waking himself up. I know that for sure as I'd tried unsuccessfully to put him in a sleeping bag 2 weeks before (he went from 1 or 2 night wakings swaddled to 9+ without it then).

The Pantley Pull-Off from the No-Cry Sleep Solution is a good method to help reduce the need to keep replacing a dummy.

Cheers angeldog. Have got the no cry nap solution so will have a look at that method.

My Ds2 was swaddled until around 8 months, and it was a godsend.

If it works for you carry on, but I'd try and ditch the dummy if it's causing more problems than it's solving.

ooh just forgot to say that the reason I found dummies so helpful for my children was that they are all very active/physical types and so being strapped into a pushchair/carseat was hard for them. I found dummies helped them to relax in these situations and that was about the only time (apart from sleep) that they used them as it seemed to help them transition from active to relaxed. I am not a fan of letting children run around/play with a dummy in the mouth. But your dd might be a calmer type of child anyway so it may not apply?

Yeah I know what you mean, when she's in the pushchair quite often she wriggles and trys to get up so the dummy does help her relax. I agree though hate to see children with them in when they're not relaxing/sleeping.

I give my DD 4 dummies in her cot at night and put them in the same corner so she knows where they are if she loses one. She just grabs another one. I can't remember how old she was when I started doing this, but she also used to be swaddled and I stopped that around the 5 months because it was waking her up when she managed to wriggle out.
She's 11 months old now and sleeps really well, finding her dummy herself if she loses one.

Yeah that's what I intended to do once she could put her own dummy in, but it will probably be a good few months before she can.

I was happy for my DD to have a dummy, but once we got to 4 months she was needing it put back in 10 times a night. After a few weeks of that we decided to go cold turkey and ditch them, she was a bit upset the first night and then it was fine she forgot all about them. We did swaddle late till about 6/7 months, but she was sleeping through with a dreamfeed by 4 1/2 months.

If you can be a little bit tough about this now, I promise it will help you with other sleep issues you will face (and there will be many!).

Our DD has (touch wood) mostly been a great sleeper, so I know we are luckier than some. We do get the odd hiccup/challenge as everyone does, but we tackle it quickly so bad habits (ours and hers) don't form.

Trust me I know it is VERY easy to get into bad habits when you are sleep deprived and it is the middle of the night and you will do just about anything to get them back to sleep.

Remember it is your job to ensure she is getting the best sleep she can and sometimes quick fixes are not best in the long run.

Thanks sunshine, you have given me some food for thought.:)