arggghh 2.5yr old STILL not sleeping through!

[choceyes]

My 2.5yr old DS keeps waking up at night screaming for milk. about 3 times in the night. It's so exhuasting. I have 9 month old DD too.

he has only slept through a handful of times ever (2 of them whilst I was at hospital having DD)

He used to only wake up the once before and we would take him in to our bed. This continued till 21 months when DD was born, and now she sleeps with us. DS was initially happy to sleep in his own bed, but most night DH went and and slept with him in the toddler bed.

But in the last few months he keeps waking up and screaming and crying for milk. DH made the mistake of giving him a bit of milk every time he woke up for a couple of months. But now he doesn't.
I don't know if he is genuinelly hungry or not. He is not a big eater during the day, only a few mouthfuls at each meals, although he has a coulpe of small snacks too. We did BLW with him, so it is impossible to get him to eat if he doesn't want to, no amount of cajoling or bribing works.
He drinks about 10oz of milk before going to bed and if he has anymore during the night his nappy leaks cos it can't take anymore. Then he has another 3oz in the morning.

why is he like this? what can I do to make it better? any ideas anyone? we are all exhuasted in this house from all this waking up and i'm finding that i'm constantly short with him throughout the day cos I'm sleep deprived. Need some urgent help.

Having a fussy eater and a crap sleeper is SUCH hard work...sigh

I would think that at 2.5 he should definitely not need to have milk in the night. If anything it could reduce what he then eats during the day making it a vicious circle. I suspect he is probably 'feeling' it a little with DD now in your bed instead and it's probably just an attention thing really.

I can sympathise with you as my DS (3yrs) is not a brilliant eater. We have recently managed to get around it a bit by telling him that he doesn't get nicer things unless he eats a certain amount of each meals (some times he is better than others - it seems this can be true of so many lo's!). He did have a time when he started waking at night and asking for more milk and although I did it a couple of times (particularly when DD was keeping him awake when newborn) I then cut it out and told him he didn't need it - the same with the evening when he goes to bed he sometimes asks for more milk and unless he had his previous one particularly early I try and resist and he usually accepts it.

I think it probably takes a bit of adjusting for toddlers when there is a new addition creating additional work when we least need it. I try and set aside time when just myself and DS are together (difficult as I also work full time) so that he gets my undivided attention to try and 'wean' him off getting the full attention of his parents as he also needs to adjust to not being an only child who in fairness was until 5 months ago the centre of the house and wasn't sharing the stage with anyone!

Good luck :)

xxx

My DS (2.2 yo) has never slept through the night ever and still wakes up between 2 and 5 times every night. This has improved slightly since I quit Bfing him when he turned 2, but he still wakes up wanting a drink or water and a cuddle.
I know how you feel (though I don't have a 9mo to deal with too). It's exhausting. My mother (who had 4 children: 2 sleepers and 2 non-sleepers) told me that it's luck if you get a sleeper, it's often down to personality and you just have to wait until they crack it themselves. All you can do is try to make things as calm and quiet as you can and see it out.

Also, The No Cry Sleep Solution book had a few good ideas that we tried. Though it didn't cure the problem it definitely helped give us ideas that worked to help DS get into a relaxed state where he was more likely to sleep.