question about behaviour of a nearly two year old

[rubytuesday11]

Hello I am a mum to be, who also works as a babysitter. I've a question regarding the behaviour of a little girl I babysat for last week and wonder if you could help, I'd just like to know more about child behaviour as very soon I will have one of my own!

I have a regular weekly job babysitting a five year old boy. There have also been a few occassions every few months when I have also babysat his little sister. The first couple of times she was about 16-20 months and would cry a few minutes when her parents left, but after a short while would be very happy to play and we had lots of fun together even though i babysit for her rarely so she does not know me. I went to babysit her this saturday now she is 23 months and it was very different. She seemed in a shyer mood following her mum round the house, and not so interested in playing with a stranger anymore,. After the parents left she cried almost non-stop for two hours, calling for her mum. It seemed like there was nothing I could do to console her, and at one point she was crying so much she threw up. She is used to being away from her parents as she goes to daycare, but perhaps not so used to being left alone with someone she doesn't know well in her own house.
I take it this is normal two year old behaviour? It was just a big shock to me as when she was younger it didn't seem to matter that she didin't know me. I was also surprised the parents did not forsee that this would happen, and thought it would be fine to leave her. If anyone out there, could explain to me why two year olds might act so differently I'd love to know so I can understand kids better, Thanks for your input!

She could be teething? Or coming down with something? My 21 mth old goes through phases of being clingy, and usually it's one of those two. The parents might not have been able to foresee it - if she's been fine before, then they wouldn't expect it. The non-consolable crying sounds like being ill to me.

DD is 21mo and was like this last week due to teething of more molars. She was really out of sorts, so much so that I actually didn't send her to the CM one day.

TBH if she had cried that much after 40mins or so I would have rung mum as she could have been ill or in pain. Was she tired? Doesn't sound that normal to me and I would assume she was ill!!!!

they can go through separation anxiety, which may be why she was fine when she was younger but isn't any more.

i;'m surprised you didn't call her parents though if she cried for that long and cried so much she was sick :(

I babysat for a 3 year old when I was 17. I didnt know the family very well but found the little boy very clingy, tearful and unable to settle to play anything. A few days later I found out he had come down with chicken pox. he had no spots on the day I had him but he was certainly 'brewing it'. I had completely forgotten the event- until I read your post. I would imagine the little girl you looked after was unwell. For the record I would have phoned the parwnts after 45 mins max- after trying other options- food, nappy, more clothes less clothes, distraction etc etc.x

Children can also be like this when they're working on a mental develompental spurt. Researchers describe them as 'clingy, cranky & crying' at these times. You can read about the effect up to the age of 20 months in the book The Wonder Weeks.

As TIY says, separation anxiety can come & go at various different times too.

My DS2 was like this all the time when I left him - so I stopped leaving him. Used to make himself sick if I left him in cot for any length of time. My family, who saw him frequently, ended up making excuses not to be left alone with him.
He got brought back from playgroup every time as he was inconsolable, so he stayed at home with me although his sibling was there.

Reckon some kids are clingier than others and get themselves worked up more.

He's now a teenager and he and his siblings think it's hilarious that he was like this.

The smallest of things can set kids off. She could have just been overtired, poorly, attention seeking bad dream the night before. There is just no way of knowing sometimes.

thanks everyone for all your perspectives, it's helping me understand a bit better! I did ring her mum after half an hour of the crying and also took her upstairs to a neighbour who is a retired nurse, who could see nothing immediatly wrong, will find out tommorow if she was ill but I think it was more a case of her being tired and cranky and probably confused that there was a stranger in her house doing all the things her mum usually does!

When I use a babysitter I get them to pop round a few days before to meet the children so at least when you show up to babysit theyw ould recognise your face.

good idea quack, quack thanks. That's what we did the first time, and I think in this case as I only babysit rarely, I think I'll have to visit a few days before every time I do it.