Partners Ex Reducing the Time He See His Children

[littledetails]

My partners ex has decided that he can no longer have his children every other Friday night to Sunday afternoon but to have them every other Saturday afternoon to Sunday afternoon....he is heart broken. He calls them a few times a week and he is a far better Dad to my children than their own Dad and my heart bleeds for him.

They were never married but he does have PR. There has never been any legal involvement just a mutual arrangement and I guess this is our only route. Anybody got any suggestions or experience with this. Please dont anyone suggest we talk to her as she is the most unreasonable, nasty horrible person I have ever meet......thats putting it lightly! He is a big softie and she walked all over him for years an continues to do so.

sympathies!!

firstly,a solicitors letter might jolt her into re instating original contact. if not,you could suggest mediation. failing that,then court will be only option. but dont hang around,needs to be nipped in the bud quickly!!

why has she reduced it and how old are te children?

fwiw,i'm no solicitor,but,in absence of any welfare issues, judge is most likely to re instate contact straight away,maybe even giving more!

does he get good contact on xmas,holidays etc?

Hi thanks for the quick reply. They tried medication when they first split, but she more or less laughed it off an when my partner refers to what was discussed she says it was a load of rubbish.

He has twin girls agd 5 and I think it has happened because I have moved in with my children and shes making things as difficult as possible for him even though she is also living with someone.

medication always helps!!

i'd say straight to court then,a free half hour with a sol,but she needs putting right asap!

he should request half of school hols too. your partner can self represent to cut costs,'families need fathers' can offer a wealth of advice on this

He had them Christmas 09, 10 and we will be having them 11. We had booked a holiday for them last year and gave her notice and she refused to let us have them 2 days before unless we paid to take them out of nursery, which he refused to do as he pays her maintenance throught the CSA....so they didnt go on holiday with us.

I think it is our only option, he will call them tomorrow. Thank you. x

FNF here they can give him excellent advice eg to ask for an interim order to re-instate contact at the previous level. He should also keep a record of any interaction with her, keep texts etc.

Thanks we are having a look on the site. I have just read that as he has PR he has equal rights. He contacted their school asking to be informed of parents evening, events etc. He was told by the school that it had to be agreed by the mother...which of course she didnt. So I think a stiff letter to the school stating his rights wont go a miss. He has missed their parents evenings and Christmas play and no doubt other things.....makes me so mad.

Actually that makes me mad as well - not only are the school wrong, but they have a responsibility to keep parents informed. You could try shaming them into it by offering to supply SAE's but ask to have a copy of the policy which states that fathers can't have information without mother's consent as it is in direct contravention of DFE guidelines. We had to do this with DSS's school. On a practical level, though, many schools have websites that give all this info.

I can not thank you enough for the information on the "Families need Fathers" website. They have been extremely helpful and given some excellect advice. So a letter is on its way and fingers crossed she will see sense and we will not have to go down the legal route. We also need to arrange a meeting with the school. Many thank again.