Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

i want another baby; he doesn't. how to handle?

3 replies

sotough · 26/04/2011 21:55

that's it really: simple, and yet, really difficult. I am sure there must be thousands of mnetters out there who've been in the same situation. how did you resolve it?
We have two gorgeous little ones. Our second, DD, arrived after two years of hell as i went through four miscarriages - so she is a miracle really. I look at her sometimes and can't believe my luck. Yet i've always wanted three children, and though i feel hugely blessed to have two, that 'want' is still there...
He is not keen and says he's too old (he is much older than me, at nearly 49..). He generously says we can have a third if i like, but is this asking for trouble in our marriage?
I am clear that I will not go through multiple miscarriages in a quest for a third child, but am willing to risk another one or two losses.
Am i being selfish? How should we handle this? We are not arguing about it at all - we are just beginning to discuss it, very gently. my DD is only four months old, so it is very early days. What would you do?
sorry if i'm posting on the wrong board. i have posted on Relationships too but no responses, which surprises me as a i reckon this must be a pretty common situation.

OP posts:
crw1234 · 26/04/2011 22:11

I think I have seen quite a few posts about this issue recently - I think in larger families

niamh29 · 27/04/2011 03:30

If you don't at least try you might end up regretting it and holding it against your DP for not being supportive. I just knew I had to have 3 and felt like my family wouldn't be complete without a third, I have 3 girls now and I know I'm finished and I'm very happy with that.

rosie1979 · 27/04/2011 18:54

I wouldnt - I am in the same position at the mo - only difference is dh is saying no he definately does not want another "at the moment".

I have probably 10 years before I am too old so time at the moment it is ok. I'm just thinking he'll be ready before too long.

I would not want to have another unless we were both up for it and 2 to 3 is a big step to take IMO.

I am one of 6 - my mum just went ahead and had babies solidly for about 7 years - my dad only wanted 1 or 2 and it definately affected their relationship. I have friends where the dh has "allowed" them to have a 3rd but isnt thrilled about it, I think its a bit sad.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread