Question for Co-Sleepers...

[RufousBartleby]

I had some great advice from people on here about my 11 month old who was a really bad sleeper. As a result we ended up co-sleeping and it is going brilliantly - its the most rested I have felt since he was born and he is much happier too.

My question is...what do you do if you have another baby?? Its not an immediate concern, but I have been wondering....

We co-slept with DD1 and frankly, it's a miracle DD2 ever came to be.....

Nevertheless, in our personal situation, we continued to co-sleep during early pregnancy, then moved dd1 into opensided cot beside bed in mid-late pregnancy, then cot in room but apart from bed, and there she remained till DD2 arrived. With heavy heart, we moved her to her own room a week before dd2, and you know what? She loved it.

That's us though - don't be downhearted if your story's different.

Thanks snigger - do you mind me asking if you were co-sleeping with DD1 because of sleep problems or through your personal choice?

We tried for 4 months to settle DS in his own room and to save our sanity have had to move him back in with us.

Ha ha ha - you don't get another baby, because baby is in bed with you & you can't, you know

Seriously - by the time you have another one, this one will be in own bed? >

We co-slept, to start with, mainly because I was extraordinarily anxious after a difficult pregnancy and was up to high do about SIDS (too much late night googling).

However, as time went by, although we had various issues about the co-sleeping, we both agreed it was worth it in the end.

Having said that, at age 2-ish (memory fades) we did do controlled crying with DD1 prior to moving DD2 into the same room - not something I was happy doing, but I felt DH deserved his say, and ultimately it worked very quickly (due to DH's extremely zealous influence)

I know what you mean about saving your sanity, though - it gets so intense. DD1 had all manner of sleep issues throughout her first three years, yet DD2 just rolled with it. I think perhaps we overthink it with our first child then we're a bit more organic and less controlled with the second one - I prepare to be proved wrong though, everyone has such different experiences!!

I see what you mean Miranda - best form of contraception eh?!

Snigger I find that encouraging! Me and DH have been saying that we will have to lie to ourselves and say that if we have another he/she will be a better sleeper! Sounds like you didn't have a massive gap between your two either...I'm slightly in awe :)

We were co-sleeping with our toddler, when baby number 2 arrived (not literally, mind!) and still are now baby is 9 months old. Toddler always goes to sleep in his own room but comes in with us if we have gone to bed when he wakes. (If we haven't gone to bed, we resettle him in his bed). Like you, we had tried (gentle) sleep training with him, but he always wakes at least three times in the night. He sleeps very well in with us, although he still stirs we can settle him easily.

When baby number 2 arrived, she was in a crib by our bed. It just didin't seem right that this tiny baby was seperated from us by a crib, and our toddler was cuddled up in between us, so I purchased a bedside cot for baby. I was/am breastfeeding baby, and although she starts the night in the bedside cot, she always ends up side by side with me, so we do have four in a bed!

Our toddler still doesn't sleep through, but he is sleeping for longer and longer in his own bed and we are hoping he will eventually sleep through, but until he is ready to (and we believe this is a developmental thing, rather than a sleep training issue), we are happy to bring him into bed with us.

On the whole, we are happy with this sleeping arrangement and it means we all get enough sleep.

therethere - wow, you sound like you've really taken it all in your stride. How do you cope with the baby crying at night? Do you find that this sets your toddler off or has it not been a problem? Agree about the developmental thing, having tried all sorts of sleep training I actually now think it is something DS will grow out of...at some point....hopefully!

Not really in my stride, more of a muddle through, but it works! We had spent months encouraging, supporting and willing our toddler to sleep to no avail and when we found the solution in co-sleeping, it made me realise how natural and right (for us) co-sleeping is. As soon as he comes into bed with us, you can seem him totally relax.

Baby doesn't cry at night, when she stirs for a feed, I feed her before she begins to cry. If I haven't gone up to bed before she first wakes, toddler is still in his bed so isn't woken up by her. Hope this makes sense! A couple of times, toddler has woken baby if he cries out at night (which he does occasionally, wherever he is sleeping)

I paint an idyllic picture, of all of us sleeping peacefully but in the early days, when baby was a newborn, it was sometimes difficult with getting comfortable etc. and I definately get the raw end of the deal when it comes to space in the bed!

I co-sleep with both my DDs (2 and 1) and always have done. I settle them to sleep together by feeding DD2 while DD1 snuggles up then I carry DD1 into her own bed. DD1 wakes about midnight and toddles through to join us. Like there there i find that DD2 rarely cries in the night as she pretty much sleeps with my boob in her mouth . The odd time one of them is ill (i say odd as they are usually ill together) they do disturb one another but this is rare and everyone is out of routine and grumpy anyway.

I am having to nightwean DD2 and after failing to do this whilst co sleeping i am going to be moving my girls into their own beds and i am geniunely going to miss our nightime cuddles and closeness.

we bought a 2 metre wide bed!!

we have 2 year old DS and 7 month old DD in with us, both from birth. we kept DS in as we didn't want him to feel pushed out when DD arrived.

Then 2 months ago DS stared ging to nursery as I went back to work so we didn't want to make too many changes at once....there is always something!!

Now I think we will move them both into their own room at the same time. Just don't know when or how !!

I am pg and cosleep with ds who will be 19m when dc2 is due. We plan to continue cosleeping (having had encouragement on here). Dh sleeps in another bed (as long as he's well rested, and i'm well fed, all is well )

The plan is that dc2 will sleep on the side of the bed that joins the cot (if not in the cot on the odd occasion) and ds will sleep on the other side of me, against a wall.

We cosleep because it makes our life easier and feels right. I am confident they'll grow out of it and am happy to bide my time.

We co-slept, started when ds refused to sleep in a cot, hated the sight of it, even the bedside one, the moment he could roll he just rolled over to be next to me! When I got pregnant with no. 2 (which took quite a lot of organising) I found the nights increasingly difficult as ds was bfing for a lot of the night and it became agonsingly painful, so I couldn't sleep. So I moved out, leaving dh and ds co-sleeping! This worked well for a while, now what we do is dh and I go to sleep in the same bed, in one room, and ds goes to sleep on a double mattress on the floor in his room. At about 1 or 2 a.m. every morning he wakes, and dh goes through to him and sleeps the rest of the night with him, as he wakes about 2 or 3 times in the second half of the night. Sometimes I go through instead, to give dh a night off. I have stopped bfing now so the agonising pain is no longer an issue. We plan to continue this pattern for a while with a new baby, I will do the night feeding (obviously) and dh will deal with ds, but also just to let things evolve. We found that when we decided something had to change (like me moving out so no more nighttime bfing), we just had to be consistent for a few nights and he would learn the new routine.