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Parenting

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Original poster

getting out of the house TIPS post here

9 replies

classyinpink · 19/04/2011 10:59

I have 4 year old and always when we are about to go out we have breakdown (meltdown, shouting match, crying, tantrums, you name it we do it) over what to take, what they are going to wear, what they won't wear, jacket, shoes, drink, food, toys....
Always end up in tears of me pulling my hair and not going out and just starting what should be a fun outing in a negative mood. And also I'm kind of person who HATES packing things so that does not help.

Can all you wise moms post good ideas about how to get ready and just GO OUT in peace please. Also list for essential items for picnic day out, swimming day out, park day out. And what to do if they won't wear what you want them to wear. Thank you.

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TobyLerone · 19/04/2011 11:05

I'd be inclined to tell her/him the plans for the next day the night before. Choose clothes, choose things to take, pack bags, lay clothes out etc the evening before. Let her choose what she wants to take, but make it clear that when the things are chosen, that's what will be worn/taken. I'd also make it clear that you need to be out of the house by a certain time and if you're late, you just won't be going.

As far as essentials go, I'd say for picnic/park you need:

Food/snacks/drinks
Ball/frisbee
Blanket to sit on
Suncream
Hat/sunglasses

For swimming, obviously you need swimming things and snacks/drinks.

Original poster

classyinpink · 19/04/2011 11:07

Thank you Toby. It just seems so straight forward and I dont know why I go nuts when it's time to go out. I will clean the room and the clothes and we will start laying out clothes for the next day. that is fantastic idea.

OP posts:

missmapp · 19/04/2011 11:10

Lay the things they are going to wear the night before ( they can choose them if this helps) and make sure they know there is no change in the morning!!

Pack bags the night before as well. I always take picnic, drinks, suncream, hats, a ball or somesort of outdoor game, sunglasses, crayons etc if going to eat out , jackets and picnic blanket.

In the morning our house rule is that no one can go downstairs unless they are dressed ( I work in the week so this helps everyone leave by half seven, it is relaxed at weekends!!) After breakfast ,if we have to go straight out we do not go back upstairs!! I bring the toothbrush, hair brush etc downstairs. If one dc doesnt wat to go, then scoop the complaint one into the car, the fussy one is generally easier without an audience.

When all are strapped in the car, go back in for a quck check you have everything.

Then go out and enjoy.

I have two ds' 3 and 6 and this is our getting out of the house routine!!

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2and1ontheway · 19/04/2011 11:11

Pack the evening before when they are in bed so as not to have to do it in front of them and provoke negotiation?

Pick your battles - are you perhaps being a bit more prescriptive about what they wear than you need to be, especially when the weather is OK... maybe put the jacket in the bag if they don't want to wear it...

If your youngest child is 4 there is no particular item that will ruin the outing if forgotten IMO - you can almost always buy a bottle of water or a fairly appropriate snack in an emergency (unless you are going somewhere really off the beaten track...) and hopefully spare clothes are no longer essential?

I would relay about it a bit tbh - my two are 3 and 5 and I have another one due next week (so refuse to help anyone dress, except buttons and zips for 3 year old sometimes) put shoes on etc as it would require me to sit on the floor and they are quite capable of doing it themselves, and it takes about 5 mins to get out of the house to be honest, but that could be because I am not too stressed about having everything perfectly organised...

I never tell them what to wear really though, unless thier choices are really ridiculous and not weather appropriate... I like my children being as independent as is realistic at their ages.

missmapp · 19/04/2011 11:11

Sorry crosspost!!

2and1ontheway · 19/04/2011 11:13

relax not relay

TobyLerone · 19/04/2011 11:20

Yes, definitely try to relax and pick your battles wisely.

Original poster

classyinpink · 19/04/2011 11:21

okay will try from tomorrow. thank you. my 4 year old changes and changes clothes last minute, will throw tantrums about what we aren't taking that will not fit anymore in the pushchair. but I will lay clothes out and be firm!

OP posts:

2and1ontheway · 19/04/2011 11:40

The pushchair is presumably not for the 4 year old (unless she has mobility problems)?

If she has tantrums about what you aren't taking, get her a little rucksack - she c an take what she herself can carry, you aren't carrying (or putting in younger siblings pushchair) anything you haven't chosen to take, giving them responsibility for their decisions is good IMO...

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