Not so long ago we had a friend of my dd over to play. They went to the shop with ds and his friend. DDs friend had a little 'accident' When they came back she was very calm and I didn't make a big deal about it. I quietly got her some clean clothes and washed hers. Discreetly mentioned it to her dad when he came to pick her up. End of story right?
Next time I picked my dc up from school the girls mother walked over to me very aggressively and asked what happened on Saturday. Said I didn't know what she was talking about. Oh yes I said girl had a little accident 'I know what happened your ds picked her up and slammed her against the wall and she was so frightened she wet herself and why didn't to tell my dh' I was gobsmacked. Told her I had no idea anything like that had happened. 'But she told you' I'd have remembered if she had. I couldn't think. Luckily my mum was there and took over the conversation as I was numb. I suffer from depression anyway and was having a particularly bad week.
How bad a mother must I be but I believed her. When I asked him he denied it and I called my ds a liar with no proof either way. My dd said nothing happened but maybe she was protecting her db which she has been known to do. My ds is a fairly typical boy. He can be quite boisterous and he beats the living daylights out of dd but outside the home including at school I'm told by everyone he comes into contact with that he is so well behaved I wonder if they are talking about the right child.
The following day I got the proof that he didn't touch her, from the shop they were in.
When this mother asked her dd why she said what she did she turned it back round on my ds by saying that he had taken the mickey out of her. So that meant it was ok for her to lie. (obviously she didn't say that. It was implied though.)
Am I the worst mother ever for believing her over him. I can barely talk to this woman without thinking about it. I had considered her a friend.