Oh, I really just miss being able to go up and lay on my bed and read on my own, in silence...

[Bumperlicioso]

I'm done in. At home with DD1(3) and DD2 (6mo). Today is the worst day of the week as DH works till 7.30. In 6 months I can count on one hand how many times the baby has gone down in the evening, and after a brief month of sleeping through between 5 and 9 weeks she hasn't slept through since. In the past month we've had chicken pox and coughs in both of them involving lots of nights awake. I'm exhausted. I just want to go upstairs and lay down with a book. My body aches but I have to push through, and even if by some chance I can get the baby to go down for a couple of hours in the evening she is still in our room due to the night wakings so I can't even go up there then.

Sorry to moan, just a bit done in and missing silence and space. Instead I am sat in the middle of chaos with whining children! Anyone else feeling the same?

didn't want to read and run. Is there no one who can give you a day (or an afternoon) off? Only have 1DS but one of my favourite bits of the day is when DP comes home and takes DS up for his bath. I get about 20 mins downstairs by myself (which I usually spend Mntting). Hope things get better soon.

Could you find someone who would be prepared to swap babyminding with you? Once you have one (or two in your case) another doesn't add to the problem too much. Then each of you could get a few hours on your own once or twice a week maybe. Even if it is just for a sleep!
I know how tiring it can be - I had three aged four and under at one point and was knackered.

Then I had another (moment of madness!) at age 42 and I remember thinking how very glad I was the other three were all grown up (16, 14 and 12).

Thinking of teenagers - what about a teenager for a few hours after school to babysit while you go out? I bet you could find one doing some kind of child care course who would love some hands on experience. Get in touch with your local college maybe and see if they run courses like that there and have kids looking for part time jobs.
Or an older lady looking for some work?
I don't know your financial position, but just a few hours a week might make all the difference to you.
Best of luck, it passes too quickly, and one day you'll be like me, with them all grown up and sad they're not little again! I know, you think I'm mad, but truly, make the most of their smallness. But get some help - respite care!

Dd2 is still bfed and pretty grumpy clingy. Dh and I are basically just co-parenting at the moment. It's not so bad. Dd1 goes to nursery twice a week, but there is little respite from dd2 all day. Dh occasionally does a full night shift with the baby but then I just sleep. There is just little time for doing nothing. Just miss it. Dh will give me breaks and I him but there just isn't much time between work etc., especially as dd2 rarely goes down in the evening.

Thanks for the messages. Just feels a little relentless.

Would it help if I tell you it will pass and you will get (some) of your life back! Babies grow and before you know it they will both be off to school and you'll be in tears as you'll miss them so much!!!

I think if you want to tackle the night wakings then you probably need to start getting some of the control back, ie deciding when you will bf and when the baby needs to sleep!!! I think I did it so that she went down at 7pm with a feed, dream feed at 10pm ish and then tried to not feed again before 5am! Obviously all well and good in theory but some nights you have to admit defeat, however personally if you are that tired I would stop bringing baby into your bed but thats just me.

'I think if you want to tackle the night wakings then you probably need to start getting some of the control back, ie deciding when you will bf and when the baby needs to sleep!!! I think I did it so that she went down at 7pm with a feed, dream feed at 10pm ish and then tried to not feed again before 5am! Obviously all well and good in theory but some nights you have to admit defeat, however personally if you are that tired I would stop bringing baby into your bed but thats just me.'

That would be ideal. Now if you could just tell me how to achieve that I'd be most grateful . Or have a word in dd's ear!

Easier said than done!
My kids ALL wanted a feed about 3am for what seemed like forever!
My step daughter, who is only 20, with her first baby (your dd2's age) has had the little blighter sleeping through the night for ages! No idea how she did it, but she IS bottle feeding and I believe this fills them up a bit more, or rather, for longer as it is less digestible.
I breast fed mine for ages, like you.
Has your dd2 started on solids yet? Maybe that would help, plus a bottle?
My older kids all went from breast to feeder cup and to wean my second child from his habitual 3am waking, the health visitor advised giving him water only at that time, as he plainly did not need a feed.
You could try that, to get dd2 to go through the night.
She'll be cross at first, but if you don't give her the breast in the early hours, the theory is that she'll give up waking up.
It DID work with my own child, amazingly! Even though I was very sceptical.
Best of luck.

Well for me a routine def saved my sanity, I know its eaiser said than done but I found having set (ish) times for feeds and sleeps worked for me and my dd - who was immediately happier and slept and fed better. At night just don't feed unless its a last resort, do you use a dummy?

I know routines can be a controversial subject on mn (so it seems) but might be worth trying to see if it works. Once we got on a roll my dd used to have a lovely 2 hr nap every afternoon, so I could watch loose women relax for a bit!

Bumper, I feel your pain.

Ds1 is a very energetic 4 yr old. Thank fuck he is a good sleeper. Ds2 is The WOrlds Most Wakeful Baby TM. Well, not quite, but he is a shitty sleeper and I spend most evenings with him ohalf asleep on my knee as he will not stay asleep on his own till about 9pm. THen I have a bath. Then I go to bed with ds2 (necessity, not lifestyle choice) and wake every few hours to pat him back to sleep. He has health probs which prevent him sleeping, but doesn't make me any happier about the sleepless nights, lol!

It is No Life, but it is for a year or 2 then it will end. IT WILL!!!

I don't have any suggestions OP but I can sympathise. My two are almost the same ages as yours, and I am a single parent. There are times I would like to run for the hills as the relentlessness of nappies, feeds and just general crying can get to me sometimes. I just focus on getting through each day and tell myself that tomorrow they will be one day older and closer to full time school