How do you discipline a 3yo?

[callmemamma]

I would like to cut the long story short so my daughter is generally very good girl but recently her childminder pointed then when she's with her she constantly screams and cries when asked to do/not to do something.
Also when playing with other children she will snatch their toys and when told this is not nice and not allowed she will scream and cry so their reaction is to give this toy back to her to overcome her behaviour.
So I must admit I was quite shocked to hear that as dd hardly ever screams at home.Yes she gets upset sometimes when asked to do something but this is very rare.Also childminder usually says how nice she played and shared and had no concerns before..
Childminder said it would be useful to know what kind of discipline is used at home(sounds almost like a suggestion as there isn't any...) and I don't know what to answer as I don't have many reasons to discipline dd at home.
So as much as I understand some action needs to be taken I am a bit clueless.

Naughty step works well for my 3.5 year old. Two warnings, then third time he's on the step. 3 mins, then he gets told why he was put there, is asked to apologise and then gets a hug and it's all forgotten about.

For really heinous acts, he would get a time out in his room. He got this once, for biting DD out of spite and being unprovoked.

He is in the habit of swinging his favourite cuddly toy around a lot at the moment and whacking DD with it. If he gets caught doing this now, there are no warnings. Said favourite cuddly goes on the shelf for 10 mins. He wails the entire time. But it works.

Good luck!

What ramona said.

warnings, then time out, or take away whatever it is.

I also threaten to withhold 'treats'. I usually give him something nice to eat, or a go on the nintendo in the afternoon, but only good behaviour gets you treats so if he is persistently rude he won't get it.

i do understand though, since I only had DS he didn't have much need to misbehave, as he had all my attention and no one to argue with!

Definitely Time Out / Naughty Step, so undesirable behaviour is ignored, not rewarded.

DS is an angel at pre-school and with his Granny, but really really testing my patience at home now. Toy time out seems to work for some things, but my god it's a battle. He just thinks that everything's a joke too which makes it even harder.

Thing is, he;s only just started being naughty (he's 3.3 now) and I've never really needed to discipline before, so don't know what I'm doing..

i would just do the following

1. ask her what the matter is
2. tell her that if she can't stop scremaing and speak in a normal voice then I can't listen
3. deal witht he problem, once she has said what it is in a normal voice

if the problem is "i don't want to put my shoes on" then the answer is, "well, i'm afraid you have to otherwise we can't go to X, Y, Z" and then putting the shoes on for her

if she snatches toys I would take it away and say "DD, X is playing with that."
if she screams then go through numbers 1-3 again, with the solution being that she can have the toy when X has finished with it

i don't think this is actually a discipline issue at all. she is screaming, not misbehaving. If the screaming is ignored and normal speech listened to then she will soon stop doing it

Thanks for all your advise!I will definitely give Time Out/Naughty Step a go when an opportunity arises and this is what childminder said she's doing.
Jareth-sounds like my dd is the opposite as she's really good at home and then this comes out when she's with other children...

He's a frigging nightmare atm.. I hate to say it, but after today, I looked at him asleep in bed and didn't like him :( :( :(
It's been a BAD day...

Anyway, I shall stop shitting all over your thread..