would you leave your children alone outside a pub whilst you were inside?

[Mirage]

I think I know the answer to this one.

This afternoon,I met dh & the dd's at the local pub for a drink,after their walk.It is a very popular place,pretty village location,but on the main road through the village.

Whilst we were there,2 children aged about 6-7 were playing in the car park.As dh started to walk the dd's back up the lane home,the children stopped to talk to him.After he had gone,they came over to talk to me.I didn't think of it at the time,but all the while I was there,at no point did an adult come outside to check on them or even look out of the window to see if they were still there.When I got home,I asked dh if anyone had checked on them whilst he was there,before I had arrived.He said no,that they'd been alone all the while.

Is it just me being over protective?I would never let children of that age play outside in a strange place without keeping an eye on them.It may be a rural area,but the car park is always packed & very busy & the children were chatting to us & had never seen us before in their lives.

I felt really sorry for them.

Yep. Totally wrong IMO. And if anything happened the parents would say that they only lost sight of them 'for a minute.'

Absolutely not!

I was regularly left outside a working men's club when I was young while my parents and grandparents were inside, and I'm still here to tell the tale, but these are different times and there's no way I would do it.

I remember fighting with my sisters in the back of a vile olive green Ford Granada while my parents had a swift one too!

These days though....

Definitely not.

I wouldn't.

I don't know what has changed, though, WWB? I mean, I know it's no longer considered safe, but I don't think it's any less safe than it was before, surely?

Never. I wouldn't enjoy myself if I didn't know my kids were safe.

I wouldn't but as i walk to and from work I see countless kids sat on pub/bookies doorsteps. Heart breaking.

I just think that media coverage means we're more aware of the dangers these days than our parents were. I'm sure the dangers existed, even then - we just didn't hear about most of them.

No. We worry when kids are asleep in car outside our house!! We let them sleep a little but lesave door open so we can see / hear them..

Used to be common where we lived, the kids looked out for themselves. Many a time I've seen kids looking bored stupid at 11pm (Yes, I did say 11pm) whilst their parents where still getting pissed in the pub. Sometimes the kids went in the pub to sit sulkily at a corner table in the dark so no-one would spot them, sometimes they would still be playing on the swings and slides in the dark.

I never reported them, because I knew there were worse things to be worried about.

prepare for the onslaught MrsMiggins

WE go to a local amateur dramatics group which finishes at 9 and I regularly see very young children on the streets (about 4 upwards) who do not look in any great rush to be going home.

Mirage, wonder if you were at the pub I work at, as we had this exact same thing happen yesturday while I was working. Our pub is by the main road thru the village & 2 children were running in & out for 2 hrs or so while I was there. Our Landlord had to have words with them for playing with the chairs the at people were trying to sit on.

Some people use the car park as a turning point & zoom in, staight up to the top & back down, it horrifying just thinking what could happen. We have no play area for children, so they run around the car park! I think it is totally wrong to leave them unsupervised while the parents enjoy a few drinks!

i would never leave my kids out side god no

Not in the car park alongside the open road, no.

In a garden out the back, yes.

i wouldnt leave my kids alone outside a pub.
however,
i have been at weddings/parties where kids have gone outside into the garden to play whilst i and dh were inside. the doors were all open, and every so often one of us, or their grandmother would look out to make sure they were ok. theyd be playing with older cousins as well, so i felt safeish. in such instances i felt there was a fine line between mollycoddling them, and allowing them freedom to explore and learn some independance.
there was an episode on er a while back when this mom left her abusive partner taking her two kids with her. she went to a shelter, but didnt stay there as felt it was very unsafe for her kids. drug addicts pimps etc. so they were living in their car. the kids were about 6 and 7ish, or maybe tiny bit older, but under ten. mom had to go to work, so the kids were alone in the car. one got there hand caught in the door coz they were fighting. what is the mn opinion on the mothers choice? could such a thing be the case with the children you noticed?

what's a pub?

sigh

In New Zealand the parents would be in serious trouble. How come so many people saw these unsupervised kids and did nothing about it? How would one of you have felt if they had been run over by a car or something?

Our landlord told the adults that the children needed to be supervised as the car park was busy & there was a main road running next to it (stating the obvious) & that he wasn't going to be held responsible if anything happened to them. They finished their drinks & left (20 mins after being told & STILL not checking the children!)

Kiwikate, I agree & of course we would have felt dreadful if anything had happened. I have mentioned in my post that we tried to make the parents aware of the potential dangers, even tho they were very obvious. But still they did nothing.

In all fairness, their children are their responcibility & the parents should know that if the children aren't at their table, then they are outside, exposed to these dangers. It is not up to anyone else to look after their children, pubs do not provide a baby sitting service.

My child is my respocibility & I watch her where ever we are.

i remember reading, a long time ago, in an something published in india i think, that children under the age of five were community responsibilty.
since then, if i see a child obviously less than five years old, i always hang around until i have assured mysellf that there is a responsible person around.

mirage could of been local kids just hanging around

as to the question though I have always taken my kids into the pub with me not left them outside
(when I was a barmaid btw)
not getting ratarsed

They weren't local children,the village is so small,that I know all the locals.They were playing on a pair of rollerskates & had a large puppy on a lead that was towing them up & down the slope leading to the road.I shudder to think what would have happened if the puppy had seen a cat or another dog & ran onto the road to chase it.

Maybe I should have gone inside & asked whom they belonged to?I feel bad about it now,it never occured to me until we were back home & I was talking to dh about them,that no one was checking on them

Don't feel bad, Mirage. You did what you thought was right at the time. No one can fault you for that. The fact that you are concerned about it at all, shows what a good sort you are