Would you/could you go away on a short break and leave 3 month old with daddy?

[boredbuthappy]

I haven't even had the baby yet, and due in a week's time, but this question is being tossed around between my husband and I. A very dear friend of mine is getting married in Italy in June (baba will be just over 3 months old)and the plan was that we would all go, kind of like a first family holiday/wedding. Southern Italy in June?.....Wonderful!! However, my husband has recently suggested that maybe I should go on my own, enjoy the wedding without worrying about looking after a baby, use the trip as a reward of sorts for being pregnant for 9 months, giving birth, and having already looked after a newborn for 3 months. Although the idea does appeal on some level, I have a sneaking suspicion that I might not be ready to leave him at 3 months. Has anyone done this? How did you feel? Did you feel guilty? Did worrying about the baby ruin your trip (and make the trip pointless). I am in a conundrum about this because we need to make bookings etc and not knowing how things will be will make it difficult to plan. What to do????? I'd be gone for 4-5 days...could make it less if I needed to....

Your DH sounds lovely. two options I think

1. all go, but DH takes the main carer role, express as much as you can (or you may find you are mix feeding anyway) so that he can do lots of feeds and you can have large portons of time "off"
2. Go, but maybe only for 2 nights - purely from the feeding issue. I have no problem with the idea of leaving a little one with a competent and trusted person (especially the dad). How many dads go back to work and travel extensively away from home for days or weeks at a time? If you can sort the feeding issue then you should not feel guilty at all, but you won't really know how you feel until baby is here.

no.

trust me, you won't want to!

i am one of the least maternal people on the planet and no, i couldn't have done this wih ff ds1 or bf ds2.

all go and book your time away for later.

I couldn't have done it. I still haven't left DS overnight and he's 22 months although I do have a night away with a friend planned for weekend after next (eek!)

Good luck with the birth etc - not long to go now :)

nope, there is no way i could have done it with any of mine. not least because i was breastfeeding.

i would all go and enjoy a family trip

no, couldnt do it. And in hindsight, even if I felt able to leave baby, I am not so sure dh would feel up to handling him on his own at that stage!

The other thing you need to ask, is how early an infant can go on an aeroplane. I was told 3 months by my gp, due to the ears being immature and the pressure in the cabin could be harmful to "new ears".

From a feeding pov, it's going to be vv tricky, but not impossible.

Leaving the baby - well I went back to work and I had to travel when she was three months old. It was hard, but not impossible. Needs must. My mat leave ended when she was 10wks old (I actually went back earlier, but that's another story)

There is no way i'd have been able to do that at 3 months old. I wouldn't have viewed it as a treat, being away from my baby would have felt like the most horrible punishment imaginable.

I spent pregnancy longing for a night out, 10 months later and i've still not been!

Yes I would have done if I'd had the chance. Frankly I would've killed for the chance of a few days away from babyworld. But you won't know how you feel about it until your baby is born.

If you do decide to go then I hope you enjoy it and don't feel guilty. We don't expect fathers to feel guilty about a baby being left with its mother do we?