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Parenting

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Original poster

When do you tell (toddler) DC1 about impending DC2?

33 replies

DitaVonCheese · 28/02/2011 23:33

DD is nearly 2.5 yo and I'm about 18 weeks pg with DC2 so still a way to go. I wasn't going to tell her until my bump is really obvious because I think 22 weeks or so is a really long time for a 2yo to wait. However, we have our anatomy scan on Wednesday and I'm a bit excited and want to tell her.

DD seems quite fond of babies at the moment (she has a 2 mo cousin) so I have broached the idea of getting one to come to live with us. We saw another baby at a coffee morning today and she seemed to say on the way home that she would like one to come and live in our house, so I said I'd see if I could sort something out.

It's still way too early to tell, isn't it?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

pozzled · 02/03/2011 21:31

DD is 2.6 and I'm 24 weeks. We told her fairly soon after the 12 week scan. Part of our reasoning was to encourage her to be gentle around me. She doesn't hurt deliberately but she will often get into our bed in the mornings and I will end up getting kicked accidentally as she crawls around. I doubt if she could actually do any harm but it would have worried me.

She seems to have taken it in very easily, helped by the fact that we have friends with small babies. She comments every now and again and is looking forward to it in her own way. We're going to keep things fairly low-key until nearer the due date and then start looking at books, showing her the clothes and stuff etc.

pozzled · 02/03/2011 21:32

My DD has enjoyed the midwife visits as well. I explained what was going to happen the first time, and she walked straight in and announced to a bemused mw: "You got to check the baby!"

MerryMarigold · 02/03/2011 21:35

I told my ds1 when he was 2.5 as soon as I was pregnant. I wasn't thinking it was a long time to wait for the actual baby, but he needed to know why I felt so awful rather than worrying that I was ill. I also took him to all my scans to help him understand more about the new baby coming/ bond with it and 'see' it. He was fascinated by scans and used to give me pretend ones at home . I think it's really important to make them as involved in the process of having a baby as possible. He also came to the hospital soon after I had had my twins by c-section, so he could see them the same day rather than waiting for next morning's visiting hours.

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Original poster

DitaVonCheese · 03/03/2011 13:44

Thanks again for the replies. Scan went well yesterday () and told DD this morning. She was underwhelmed to say the least!

OP posts:

MerryMarigold · 03/03/2011 15:16

Good news on scan, Dita. She'll be excited by the time it comes, in love with it for 2-3 weeks and then despise it for the following 6 months-1 year when she realises it is NOT going to go away. (Well, this was my experience - ds1 was a week off 3 when I had twins). There's a good book called Sibings Without Rivalry - it's particularly good if you've ever had any sibling issues yourself that you may bring into your parenting.

Original poster

DitaVonCheese · 03/03/2011 22:15

Forgot to say, I'm a clearly a bad mum because I am still hefting lifting DD and she's always rolling across/bouncing on my stomach - I do worry about it a bit but I reckon it's pretty well protected in there.

Our hospital specified in the booking letters that we couldn't take children to scans, so DD hasn't been to ours. For the first one, DH had to come along and then just sit outside with her, and then the MW who saw us afterwards asked if she'd come in so clearly it would have been an option after all :(

I think the library has that sibling book, will look out for it ta :)

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Original poster

DitaVonCheese · 06/03/2011 22:02

Just wanted to update - after two days of thinking about it, DD is now very excited She is talking to the new baby a lot (though also to my breasts quite a lot ), though we did have a confusing conversation today in which I had to reassure her that it wasn't a baby her in my tummy :)

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Alibabaandthe40nappies · 07/03/2011 12:54

Dita that is lovely

We've just had an amusing conversation here - DS just found all the bits of my breast pump and bottles (hoping not to need it all this time but being prepared!). He asked if the bottles were for the baby, he has seen friend's babies being bottle-fed.
I explained that yes they were for the baby, but that mostly the baby would drink straight from me like he used to. He went all misty-eyed 'yummy mik-mok in your bed Mummy, it was very nice'. Bless him

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