Overwhelmed by rewards at school

[antimony]

I'm wondering if anyone else thinking along the Alfie Kohn lines has any thoughts about to cope with a rewards-driven school system. My kid has been in reception for 6 weeks and he is completely overwhelmed by it. I don't want to sound precious but he is talking about it all the time - who is on what colour and why, trying to recreate it at home, and worse having night terrors about it. The whole thing seems to be making him really anxious. I don't think there's any mileage in trying to get school to think about how counterproductive rewards can be, though I will try to get them to help him feel less overwhelmed by it, but what can I do at home to help him get used to it and preferably focus more on the other aspects of school? He is so stressed, it's heartbreaking - and of course he now wants stickers for everything. Any ideas?

There's been some discussion of this on the Unconditional Parenting Support Thread which might be interesting for you.
Could you sit down with him at a quiet moment and try to explain to him really really simply why you don't agree with rewards.
I wonder if it would help just to tell him:
"Do you know, I think all these colours etc etc. are a bit silly. I love you no matter what you do. I will love you if you do xx and I will love you if you DON'T do xx. What's important to me is that YOU are YOU! And I think it's better if you just enjoy learning about numbers and enjoy learning to read because then you can read really nice books. I think it's great if you enjoy helping people because you see how happy it makes them.
That's what is important to me. All of these colours and charts and things are a bit of a game that they are playing at school. But, I don't really like it that much".
I don't know whether that would be helpful or not??!!

And I would try politely to mention to the school how you feel. They've maybe never come across the ideas which Alfie Kohn describes, but they will only start to question their rewards scheme if enough parents complain - or if an enlightened teacher turns up. So a) you can mention Alfie Kohn so a teacher MAY discover it and MAY start to question their own ideas and b) you can give them your vote AGAINST the rewards scheme...