Help - feeling really guilty about DS having fillings

[SpudtheScarecrow]

Took DS1 (5.5) to the dentist yesterday and he needed 2 fillings. He had 1 back in August. I feel dreadful and am having a really good think about his diet to see what we can do to improve things.

I am a bit confused though by some of the dentist's recommendations and how they fit within a balanced diet - she said aim to be sugar free. For example, she said 'no juice' but suggested milk or water (fine he doesn't have much juice anyway) or weak tea which seemed an odd thing to suggest! (don't have a problem with LOs drinking tea if they want it but it seems a strange thing to start when he hasn't asked for it) Similarly she suggested plain toast with butter for breakfast instead of cereal which seems a bit dull for every day and potentionally high in fat and not v filling (could use marg I suppose but don't really like it) But then, she said he could have cornflakes which I would have thought would be bad for sticking in teeth. Unfortunately he doesn't like porridge which DH, I DS2 and DD have.

I suppose what I'm really wondering is, is it possible or indeed desirable to aim for a sugar free diet for a 5 year old and if so, what kind of snacks etc can I give and how can I ensure plenty of vitamins etc if not having fruit.

He does snack quite a bit which I'm going to cut down/out as I think it might be the frequency of sugar in contact with his teeth rather than the amount but she seemed to think it was the presence of it in his diet full stop.

Anyway - sorry for all the rambling - I do really want to improve things so not looking for excuses. Thanks to anyone who's made it to the end and any advice gratefully received

Or he ay just be prone to fillings. I had four in my milk teeth but have zero in my adults teeth and the dentist has said he doesn't think I will ever need any.

As long as your son has a balanced diet and is brushing properly I wouldn't beat yourself up too much.

I am no expert, but I think it's better to have fruit/juice and anything else sugary or acidic at meal times rather than in between as more saliva is produced which helps dilute/neutralise the erosion effect. I also read somewhere that you should not clean teeth straight after eating sugar/fruit etc as the acid weakens the enamel so the tooth brushing then does more harm than good.

I also seem to remember reading that some foods can have a positive effect by neutralising the acid - so it's good to eat a tiny piece of cheese after eating fruit for instance.

I have loads of fillings and have had since early childhood. I was only allowed sweets after meals and was always sent straight up to brush my teeth after - breakfast, lunch and dinner(was allowed them twice a day though, which might explain it).

Sorry - not v.helpful, but I feel for you. Neither of mine have needed a filling but I dread the dentist, and know I will feel gutted if they do. But hope you can improve things.

Thanks both of you. I thought the same as you dotty but this dentist seemed to be saying that total elimination was the only way. My teeth aren't great either so I have the same dread. Have stocked up on babybels for snacks tho

There is no point in feeling guilty as you were not aware you were doing anything wrong.
The important thing is to prevent it getting worse by getting advice from the Dentist and following it,.. cutting down on sugary foods/sweets and making sure teeth are brushed regularly.

There is sugar in all sorts of foods so it is easy to be unaware of just how much sugar you are having or giving your child.
I find it easier to stick to as much fresh foods as possible and limit the processed stuff.

don*t feel bad.
just make sure you brush his teeth mornings and before bed and try to avoid sugary snacks.
you might also consider to have the back teeth sealed by the dentist for extra protection.

Thanks Davs - we don't have much processed food. That's what confused/worried me really - not sure whether I should be trying to eliminate sugar from natural sources like fruit as well. Will just try and keep an eye on it I guess.

It could be a factor outside your control.

My boy has compacted enamel ( it's weak) and the dentist asked me if I had taken any medication during my pregnancy with him - I had for a health condition I have.... and apparently that can affect the development of teeth... So his younger brother will have the same issues - in fact worse cos' I had to have loads more meds when pregnant with him..

So don't feel guilty... Though I do - I feel teary about it. But dentistry is very sophisicated these days...

Get a timer for doing their teeth, get an electric toothbrush for him, get him to brush his teeth after meals/snacks as much as you can, eat cheese after sugary snacks and when he's older hand over sugar-free gum!

Thanks all. I lurk a lot on mumsnet but don't post much so am grateful anyone even made it to the end of my rambling OP.

I think I feel bad as I don't feel being totally sugar free will be achievable for us. But I guess I long as we try and reduce it as much as possible it should help.
Pancake - I ordered a timer this morning - had been meaning to get one for TV watching/Wii anyway

I can't see a totally sugar-free diet for my son either ( he is classified as really underweight for his age and I have to feed him cake all the time) so I think I have to attack it from the angle of trying to keep teeth super clean.

The guilt is immense - just take out health insurance for future dentist treatments cos braces and veneers cost a bomb!

Pancake - I'm coming from the opposite side - my DS is fairly slim at the mo but eats like a horse - if all he has is cheese, butter etc I'm worried he'll end up huge!

The insurance idea is a good idea

I think mine has that build of being super skinny and can eat everything in the world but it will be when he's middle-aged the wobbly tummy appears (like his daddy)

The Dr suggested I tie his legs together to stop him running everywhere and feed him cake twice a day.. 6 months on... still no weight gain but I didn't tie his legs together. Arghhhhhhhh he's a bottomless pit.

Sorry - going off on a tangent now...

I have decided when he gets his adult teeth it's electric toothbrush time.

Hi, does your dentist offer a free service teaching you how to brush children's teeth? Our session was totally ace and really helpful. I honestly thought that because I've been brushing my own teeth for decades I was doing fine, and it turns out I wasn't!

I wouldn't worry about high fat in things like butter - young children need fat in their diet.

Definitely avoid sugary children's cereals or adding sugar to cereal, but just plain rice crispies or cornflakes would be fine I'd have thought.

I probably wouldn't eliminate all fruit, but maybe limit it and have it as part of a meal rather than a snack. I would drop the fruit juice as that can be particularly damaging. Also avoid dried fruits and fruit chew bars.

You can buy Puffed Wheat- the rude health brand have no added sugar or salt whatsoever.

Our dentist told ud that if they are going to have sweet things have them straight after dinner, not inbetween

Thank you so much everyone - am feeling bit better now.

Am going to find out about the tooth sealing thing and possibly checking that we're brushing properly tho I did ask if we were may be not brushing right to the back (both fillings were back teeth) and that was when she said it was about eliminating sugar not brushing.

The 'puffed wheat' is a great suggestion, thanks. Have seen rude health brand around but not tried it yet

I had absolutely crap milk teeth - am now 42 and have not one filling.

DD2 (8 today) has one filling - mind you, that was because she broke a corner off a tooth because of tooth grinding at night. DD1 has no fillings yet.

DH has a mouthful - I really hope the DCs have inherited my teeth.

FWIW my dentists says genetic factors are the main contributor to the strength of one's teeth.

You're all lovely - thank you so much - I was half expecting everyone to say their children had no sugar and so no fillings etc etc.

Am off to do school run now so won't respond again for a while but thanks again for reassuring me.

The reason for the dentist suggesting weak tea is because tea contains flouride which, I've been told, is good for teeth.

There's not much chance of eliminating all sugar from your DS's diet, but there are things you can do to minimise contact between sugar and teeth.

Will your DS drink watered-down pure fruit juce through a straw (my dentist recommended this for my DC's) as most of the juice will go straight to the throat. I was also, told to get a small cube of cheese (after a meal), rub around your teeth and then eat. There are certain compounds in cheese which help tp remineralise teeth. Chewing gum (Extra/Orbit and others with xylitol) can help the production of saliva which in turn releases enzymes to neutralise acid.

Hope this info helps and I hope your DS doesn't suffer much with his adult teeth.

We had a 'talk' at ds's nursery about teeth. We were told that teeth shouldn't be exposed to sugar more than 5 times per day so breakfast,lunch,tea and 2 snacks. Inbetween these times just water and sugar free snacks should be given. They said things like raisins are seen as a healthy snack but are bad for teeth so should be given at a meal time.

Does your child get enough vit D? This is just as important for good bones as calcium. I give my DD of 2yrs Haliborange vitamin liquid and make sure she gets enough sunshine (obviously when the weather improves), have never used suncream on her but she is mixed race.

With regards to diet, fat won't make your child fat, excessive intake of carbohydrates will... so too much sugar and starchy foods. Butter is naturally nutrient rich so is great for kids, maybe with a little peanut butter on toast? Does he like eggs? A soft boiled egg with soldiers might go down well. My DD loves raw carrot so perhaps vegetable sticks with a cheese dip would be good as a snack? Its better to eat fruit than to have pure fruit juice... apple and orange juice have as much sugar as coke! A piece of fruit won't contain anywhere as much as that, except bananas which are quite sugary.

hi

frequency of sugar intake m atters more than quantity ( within reason) make sure sweet treats are in child portion a 2 bar kitkat is adult portion a 2 year old should have 1/2 a bar, or 3-4 chocolate buttons not a packet

don't brush teeth immediately after fruit, too much fruit can cause erosion (thinning of enamel)as can fizzy drinks esp sugar free ones as they are as acidic as car battery acid, drink via straw

good advice finish meal with cheese, male sure has enough calcium milk yogurt etc. vegetables are better than fruit and just because fruit iis healthy does not mean you can have unlimited quantities
sticky sweets do more damage than those swallowed quickly

when brush teeth dont rinse out the froth helps protect teeth, ask re fluoride drops/tablets is live in non fluorinated area some are against it but I worked as dentist in birmingham( has fluoride in water) then moved to scotland filled more holes in kids teeth in 3 weeks in west scotland than in 3 years in birmingham though scotland has imprioved in last 10 years

genuine enamel defects are very rare can get baby teeth sealed if vulnerable about 1 in 3 5 year olds have a filling/decay
see if an oral health educator/ hygienist available to go over toothbrushing and get 2 minute timer also all kids under 7 need supervision briushing teeth as they don't clean back ones properly

just a bit of advice hope it helps