Why do so many parents offer pudding to toddlers?

[CaroBeaner]

I never got into the habit of offering two-course meals to my children, probably because I work, don't have time to think about it, and consider routine yogurts to be expensive, and heavily packaged. I'm not evangelist about any of that, I just got on with making sure they had a balanced main course.

So, whether my kids ahve been good eaters or not, none of the have ever made a fuss wanting pudding in favour of main course. Pudding was never there as a bribe or incentive, either, so maybe for this reason they are not especially fussed about sweet things as treats - they enjoy them if they get them, but they don't clamour for them, or stuff their faces with the leftover Christmas chocs out on the worktop, just have a little if they feel like it.

I am often puzzled when I see people weaning toddlers always offering something as dessert. What is the purpose?

I think we've gathered why she cares TGB.

Because she was expecting us all to rush in and say "oh, yes, isn't it terribly common, all those non-working mothers stuffing Mr Kiplings down their toddler's necks".

But I'm sure she'll be pleased you stuck up for her.

The opposite, actually, Bucharest.

I thought lots of other parents were making things like rice pudding or other desserts from scratch.

I offer yoghurt usually. Because he'll do anything for a yoghurt, including sitting on his chair and using his knife and fork (not as an aeroplane).

So it is, in our house, a highly successful strategy for bribing the child to eat his dinner in a means that doesn't drive me to distraction.

It's less about the food, and definitely more about the table manners.

CaroBeaner I don't think you deserve a flaming at all, but people do get a bit antsy about the pudding thing.

I've just noticed that this is not AIBU, but parenting......

I never offered puddings to my child because we never had them - now he and DH are totally uninterested in any sort of pudding which is a shame as I would love to have treacle tart etc once in a while .

"I thought lots of other parents were making things like rice pudding or other desserts from scratch."

Well statistically I'm sure you're right some do. Though none of my friends do. We're all in teh yoghurt/fruit/rice pudding/plain ice cream camp.

Do you not have other friends with childrne a similar age?

I offer yoghurt/fruit etc to my baby at most mealtimes. Not always as the second course though...depends how organised I am at cooking the dinner!

I enjoy different tastes and like to have savoury and sweet - seems that she likes the same. Occasionally I give her jelly or custard if that's what we're having. Yesterday I had a teacake, she enjoyed a piece of it. At the weekend she had a spoonful of her granddad's ice cream. At nursery they have two course cooked lunches and she likes most of the main courses and puddings.

She's also tried curry, lasagne, ate a mini Christmas dinner. We cook the vast majority of our food from scratch and have small portions of things we really enjoy. Puddings/sweet things are not a treat or bribe in our house, just something we enjoy having most days. Usually it is fruit and/or yoghurt but once or twice a week we have something baked like scones or buns or maybe MIL will bring us an apple pie.

My gran has/had a very healthy lifestyle and diet but also really enjoys her food and that's how I'd like my daughter to be. Gran is hale and hearty at 89 and has weighed between 9 and 10 stone all her adult life apart from her pregnancies. She is still active and enjoys gentle walks and dancing.

By contrast my mum lived on Slimcea and cup a soup when I was a kid whilst envying us all the 70s and 80s crap we ate (white bread, fried stuff, angel delight etc...). She was slim but anxious about her weight, didn't enjoy her food and chain smoked to keep her weight down and used to drive to the end of our road to post a letter! She was 8 stone til she quit smoking, she's now 14.

I have dieted on and off since I went to secondary school but now I prioritise being active and eating quality food. I am plumper than I would ideally choose to be, but I would rather be happy and healthy at size 10/12 (built very much like Gran!) than follow a restrictive diet. I am keen on good dental hygiene so not concerned about sugar and baby's teeth, and we don't have sugary drinks, it's water or milk for her and water or tea for us.

A long explanation, but that's why I give my child "pudding"!

My children both have pudding every day, I make fresh at the weekends and will freeze apple pies/crumble, that kind of thing. However I am a sahm currently. When I worked full time I used to just give the kids fresh pineapple or banana and some yoghurt - something along those lines. I started doing this with my first child because he was always hungry and to give him more variety in what he ate. However I did want him to be healthy.

At the end of the day we all generally mimic our own way of eating when feeding our children.

We never had puddings so I never really offered them to my children - but only because thats the way it was in our family.

All families are different so I guess its what you are used to.

I don't like to see parents giving a pudding when the child has refused the main meal.

...because it keeps my two quiet for 5 mins and stops them throwing food at each other. I'll do anything for a bit of peace.

Because the adults are having some and we all eat together as a family and why shouldn't they not be allowed the same as everyone else?

It isn't every night. It isn't always sweets. But just because someone is under 20 doesn't mean they can't have pudding.

My children have had pudding pretty much since I weaned them. Almost always fruit woith or without natural yoghurt. It's tasty, it's healthy, it fills them up. What's not to love about pudding?

They have a 'treat pudding' like rice pud or custard or ice cream on Sundays. It's nice to have special, treat or celebratory foods.

Sod that. Puddings rock!!!
My dd has mega high metabolism so I encourage pudd. Ds and me r just piggy.

My HV said we should offer DD pudding as otherwise she wasn't getting enough calories, so that's why we do it

Oh, and she does have balanced main courses.

My two are always have pudding. It doesn't have to be unhealthy.
It's is a good way of getting calcium and fruit into the diet.
It encourages us all to sit longer at the table to chat.
It introduces the kids to the structure of eating at restaurants.
It is a good way to top up my active ds with the required calories.
Perhaps, it is because the get pudding, it is viewed as a normal part of their diet and not a treat / reward.

As long as the diet is balanced and varied, I don't worry. I would be more concerned if toddler was eating processed foods, high salt etc.

I don't offer pudding. I offer dessert

Am also in the [local] habit of offering 3 course meals to my children.

I'd never think to do a pudding (or fruit/yoghurt) as an everyday thing either, Caro. My parents have never done puddings, just the one course other than sometimes for Sunday lunch, so that just seems the 'normal' thing to do for me. I mainly make pudding if the main course is leftovers & looks a bit short to go round.

Its horses for courses though, I often make cakes and so we might have tea and a piece of cake when dd gets in from school or for elevenses at the weekend. I reckon over all it probably evens out.

Come to that, I wouldn't generally have pudding at a restaurant either (never have space, & DH can't generally eat any of them anyway as he can't eat dairy).

Sorry RL got in the way. I meant to say that we usually do several small courses for variety and because that was the way it was always done in DH's family and I prefer it to the way it was always done in my family.

Wait until you have a teenager and then ask again. My eldest eats dinner and then looks to have another meal on top! If a pudding isn't forthcoming, it will be biscuits and chocolate, although I do try to guide him towards fruit.

I do realise the thread is about toddlers not teens before anyone jumps on me, but I believe toddlers need energy giving food almost as much as teens.

Because it tastes nice!

DD gets pudding because it's practically the only calcium-rich kind of food she will eat. She won't drink milk, she doesn't much like cheese apart from in sauces or on pizza and green leafy veg is something I can only dream of her eating. So a yoghurt with chopped fruit or some custard on a fruit crumble is providing her with some much-needed calcium. Also, she's tiny and skinny and needs the calories.

Should I give her vitamin and mineral supplements instead?!

It seems much more sensible to just let her eat something that she enjoys and is good for her.

We had the most "unhealthy" puddings as routine when we were children. (in the 70s) . terrible things like jelly with a layer or angel delight/instant whip on top. "Saucy sponge" horrid packet mix. etc. I could write a long list. . In those days spaghetti hoops were a vegetable so possibly the puddings were more nutritious than the dinners!

Often when my dcs have a snack type meal/tea then everything is on the same plate, and I make no fuss if they (for example) eat a banana before a sandwich or a yogurt before pitta bread.

Occasionally we have say a home made sponge pudding at the weekend and for reasons of convenience/tradition serve it when most people have eaten at least some of the main course.

Having said that we are fortunate in that our dcs are fairly non-fussy. On the days that they don't eat the main course it is usually because they are ill and quite honestly I would rather they had a yogurt or rice pudding or similar than nothing. :)