Worrying about my august born DS in nursery.

[Iwantscallops]

He is the youngest in the year group, well until a few rising threes started this term. Everything has been going along swimmingly, he settled in no problem at all, met a new best mate (they are inseperable) and seems to have a good relationship with the other children.

Then, we ment to a party last months,(one of the older boys in the class) and I realised the difference in the age makes such a difference. The older boys were so boisterous (like older boys usually are) and I don't think my DS knew how to deal with it. He's sensitive and doesn't yet know how to play like that, I think partly because he is younger and also because his friends don't.

Anyway, a few weeks ago we went to another party and he came over to me crying. One of the bigger boys had called him a baby and it upset him so much. Later, he told me he isn't the only boy to be told this, but I can see it's playing on his mind. Also, today he came home and said "X is a bully", which is something I think one of the kids must have said because DH and I have not mentioned the word to him - purposely.

I guess, what i'm asking for is reassurance that everything is going to be ok. I have told him if the boy calls him a baby to stick up for himself, tell him he's not and walk away and play somewhere else. I just don't want this to affect his self-esteem. Anyone have any ideas on what I could do...if anything?

My brother is an August baby and it did show at school because some of the other boys had a year's headstart over him in terms of maturity, physical development etc. TBH though it was more my parents who noticed it - he was fine at school, had lots of friends and did well at sports. Without seeing for myself, I would say that the boys calling your son a baby are just being unkind rather than it being anything that your son is doing differently. In terms of maturity and development, he will catch up in his own time.

One thing that my brother really did hate was having his birthday during the school holidays so he couldn't hand out invitations or bring sweets to school and there was always a fair chance that a lot of his friends would be away on holiday. It's a bit early as your DS is still in nursery but it might be good to think of strategies to deal with this before he starts school.

Thanks for your advice, I agree - it probably is me that notices it and maybe i'm overthinking it.

I think it's his first realisation of the big bad world and I don't like it!

This is the same for my dd, who started preschool 4 weeks ago. She's always struggled at mixing with other children, so I felt pleased when her teacher said yesterday she'd been playing with X. Until on the way home dd asked me why X called her a baby . She is definitely socially more immature than the older 3s - I guess we have to hope they either find others like themselves, or catch up quick! Although I'd hate to lose her lovely little character!

My DS is august born and has just started reception as the youngest in 90! I worry about him, but he is doing really well. I started him in Pre school at 2.5 as I wanted him to have the same amount if time there as some of the older ones and I worked hard to make sure he was confident in getting dressed and getting coat and shoes on etc, as I didn't want him to stand out as the baby IYSWIM?
There are things you can help with to make the differences less obvious.