I'm really surprised by the would you leave your baby thread

[compo]

wow I'm really in the minority here. So no one would leave their child fast asleep in a hotel room when they were downstairs at a wedding reception? Even if they checked on the child regularly?

I don't see the problem leaving baby in a hotel room (as in locked bedroom) if you have a monitor and baby is safely in car seat, cot, travel cot etc and cannot get around the room if he/she wakes. I personally wouldnt leave a child in a room alone if he/she isnt in a travel cot or strapped in a pram.

Definately dont agree with leaving baby in pram in unlocked easily accessable room.

i understand what your saying about being electrocuted at home but people will know that hes with you at least, i dont really know what i mean acctually but i just couldnt leave her in a car, iv sat in a car with doors closed etc for ten minutes on a hot day and its stiffling, just couldnt do it. wasnt saying that anyone else should do as i do, just explaining why.

oh now im confused, rambling and need to shut up!!!!!

i would never leave a baby in a pram outside a shop.
ever.
obviously i dont think leaving the kids asleep in a locked car, for a max of ten minutes is neglect. or i wouldnt do it. ive discussed this with many people in rl, and the consensus seems to be that if possible, it should be avoiided, but if needs be then ok.
i wouldnt let a baby, or child sleep in a hotel room without a parent present. (my sisters, or granparents also ok) but at a wedding, i have left dd sleeping on some chairs, asking some family memebers to keep an eye on her, whilst i went off to see to guests. at the time i didnt think there was anything wrong with it. but from this thread, i am thinking i shouldnt have.

dp came home v upset a few weeks ago after reading a newspaper article about a 2yo who died after being left in the car alone. he managed to get out of the seatbelt and stood up to poke his head out of the window. unfortunately he stood on the button for the electric window and choked to death.

i never leave the kids in the car for more than 30 seconds if i cant see them. i will run into the house to grab something but that is it. i know this stuff is unlikely to happen but the fact is it does happen.

I have left DS1 as a baby and used baby listening service.

Now that kids are 2 and 4 I find it more problematic as if they did wake up then they could well be frightened, get out of hotel room. Saying that last August when DS1 was just turned 3 and DS2 1 we left them in a hotel room while we had dinner. I cannot remember if they had baby listening. We did explain to DS1 before he went to sleep, that we were going to dinner and would be back soon. He was fine and happily went to bed, we checked on him in 10 minutes and he was fast asleep. We did check on them every half an hour or so and told the reception that they were there.

Blimely that newspaper story is being used a lot today! The little boy was not in the car, he was playing outside, the car was parked with it's window open, he climbed in and then trod on the button when he tried to climb out. It had a fault apparently that enabled the electric windows to work even when the ignition was not switched on. Those circumstances could never have been forseen, it was very very unlucky.

sorry rhubarb, i just got the story from an upset (and rather drunk) dp.

the point is that it could not have been foreseen. if you could see these things coming you wouldnt leave the kids, so my thinking is that you dont leave them because these things can and do happen. it would offer me no comfort at all to be told that 'i wasnt to know' and 'its very rare for kids to be hurt' if something like that happened to one of mine. if you choose to leave your kids unsupervised that is the risk you take, however small it is

gigi, there is such a thing as mollycoddling.
i will sit in the car outside the shop whilst ds1 who is eight years old goes in to buy milk. a friend of mine thinks that isnt on. but in three years time he is going to be in secondary school. if he doesnt start learning to take care of himself now, then when?

i dont believe in mollycoddling either, and ds1 regularly goes to the post box at the end of the street for me (ok i watch him but he doesnt know that). and i would allow an 8 yr old in a shop to buy a pint of milk, especially if you are outside.

there is a big difference between letting your kids grow up and leaving a baby or toddler alone.

What struck me most about the couple in question at the wedding was that they could be so relaxed about their baby when she was still very very small. At this stage I was still so utterly hormonal and irrational that I couldn't have left either of my dd's out of sight in these circumstances, no way. And this is apart from the fact that I think it's generally not a good idea. I'm just amazed that not every mother/parent shares these intense feelings of panic/wishing to protect that I felt so, so strongly.

I can not believe how many people don't see a problem leaving a child unattended in a hotel room. Perhaps because I am in the industry and that makes me more aware of the dangers that's why I am so against it. It is not the same as people who live in big houses. In a private house no one else has access to the room where your child sleeps. In a hotel many people do. Chamber maids, reception staff, porters, maintenance staff, duty managers, nigh porters, the list is endless. Break ins are rife. We organise and run many conferences in hotels every week and nearly every week we have a delegate who has had something stolen from his room. You just do not know who is walking teh corridors. Hotels are open to the public. Private homes are not.

Most of the big hotels groups will now not offer a baby listening service as they don't want any comeback should any thing go wrong. Reception staff have enough to do and can not take responsibility for the welfare of your child.

Of course all Hotels are different and a 400 bedroom city centre hotel will be much higher risk than a 12 bedroom hotel in the lake district. I know I am going on about this but I have witnessed a breakin whilst 2 unattended children were sleeping and their Parents were distraught and tried to blame the hotel staff.

Why should our children be the responsibility of hotel staff? We would be the first to make a fuss if anything happened to them.

I do not understand why a hotel would put itself it such a position of trust. The consept should be banned.

Northener, didn't read your whole post. I can understand why hotels are refusing to do this. The implications surely are far to great!

I spent 3 nights in Singapore & Dh wanted to go to the hotel bar for a drink so I stayed with DD while she slept. It never even occured to me to leave her, not for a minute. The mere thought of her waking in a strange room, alone is enough to make me stay by her side.