Age gaps between DCs...long or short? Decisions decisions!

[NinkyNonker]

As per the title really...dd is 6 mo and the conversation has reared its head about dc2.

We had originally thought 2 yrs, but of course it took us 6 mo to conceive dd...if that were the case again we'd have to start soon! But then what if I fell really quickly...potentially very close together. But then I might really struggle, it might never happen!

So what are people's experiences/opinions on optimum age gaps?

If this'd be better in another area let me know.

Thanks!

We have 3 boys, there are 16 months between each pair, so at the moment we have a 5, 4 and nearly 3 year old.

I was 37 when I started having children and like Lucilastic I didn't have the luxury of a long age gap.

I had 3 in nappies it was tough but manageable. Now I'm down to one and I don't know myself. I think it's easier to deal with more nappies once you've not left them behind for a long period of time.

Because of the short gap, they are very good together. This isn't to say they don't have their moments but generally they are very good friends and are all into the same type of thing at the same time.

I have friends who are in similar situations but with children in their teens and they say that the children tend to stick together when out and about. Perhaps that's just luck of the draw.

I am currently pregnant with DC2 and morning (all day) sickness has just hit...DD1 is 11 months and there will be a 19 month age gap between them. I wanted to get the baby time done asap - sleepless nights/bottles/nappies etc. And I know it will be hard work for a while for sure, but I'm prepared for that.
Anyway - just wanted to say that I am finding it tough to be pregnant with such a little one who needs my attention so much - just another aspect to think about.
I agree with some of the other posters though - you can't plan it too much.

there's 15 months between my sister and me - it was quite hard work for my mum when we were little but she preferred having two close together and was still in the baby zone for naps, feeding, nappies etc when my sis came along. now we get along really well, have mutual friends and we always had someone to play with on a fairly equal footing.

My dc are almost 3 years apart (not by design, was aiming for more like 18 months) and I hate it - sometimes they can play together nicely but the elder one (5) can forget his strength, expects little one to do what he tells him to, can get jealous of when you have to deal with little one.

little one(2) on the other hand is too little to understand that he can hurt people too, especially when he copies his brother and can't quite manage to do pretend karate on the rest of the family. wants to join in with everything but not quite able to, you think you have just about got clear of nappies and then you have to start again...

Surprised to hear how many people think that 3 years is a good gap - definitely a big No vote for it here! Just hoping it gets better when they are older.