toddler obedience training

[Unwind]

I know it is normal for two year olds to fail to come when they are called - but mine is the worst I know.

E.g. at the park with friends, they call their dc, who are the same age, and mostly they come. My dd invariably looks at me, laughs, and heads off in the opposite direction.

She is hell bent on escaping from me wherever we are, I know I can use reins/buggy for safety's sake, but I would really love to teach her to come when she is called. Is luring her by shaking a bag of buttons the only answer? I fear that I will become a kind of pied piper, collecting lots of toddlers wherever I go...

lol. Mine will be like this, I think. I think you'll just have to go and get her for a wee while longer. Perhaps she'll grow out of it.:)

probably, though all this running is so undignified

and I am never, ever again taking her into any kind of shop unless she is securely fastened to a trolley or pram

it's a game, she's intelligent and independent.

that's what i tell myself anyway....

mine is exactly the same, like 'come here' means race off laughing in the opposite direction. In fact she does not really respond to any kind of order ; you have to have strategies...

I find 'let's' and 'shall we' and 'oh look, DD, at the puppy' blah blah works better than the imperative. When it's her talking, she finds that the imperative works very nicely, thank you ('mummy, wear these knickers'). Also 2 (well, on Tuesday)

I have learned to stop saying "let's" and "shall we" since questions like that always lead to "NO"

I have to use reverse psychology, but she is not stupid enough to say no, when I ask if she wants to stay in the play area

gawd...don't ask 'em questions!!

TELL THEM!

...a constant stream of "right off now to tesco, shoes on, and get my keys and close the door, into the car...spitspot, oooh look at that, (snicks child into seat straps) off we go, up the road...."

Don't give them the chance to formulate a plan! :o

oh dear - reading it back it does sound awful, doesn't it? I think I am actually far more bossy than I made myself sound (DD is not really a big 'no' girl, although I am trying to train DP out of 'do you want' questions...)

but I do find it works better than shouting...

It doesn't sound awful, just that your DD might not be so inclined to say "NO, NO WAY", which is what my (just) two year old says to most things.

Also don't use the word IF, instead use WHEN!!

IE. Not IF you're a good girl and hold mummy's hand I will give you chocolate buttons

But ... WHEN you are a good girl and hold mummy's hand I will give you chocolate buttons.

The first is a choice (as above)^^ and is open to NO!

The second is the same thing ish but you are laying out the expectations you have for her with no wiggle room.

It drives me mad too. I find that a countdown (5 mins 'til we have to go; 2 mins 'til we have to go....) works a lot of the time although I can feel the eyes of every other parent on me waiting to see what happens when I get to "time to go...now!"

Bribes rewards for good behaviour also work well.

Otherwise it's a choice - "are you going to walk with mummy or am I going to carry you out..!" Fortunately at the moment I am still a bit quicker.

Oh and be consistant!

If you always expect her to hold hands when
in a shop for example then don't even once allow it not to happen. Pick her up if needs be and she'll soon cotton on.