Attachment to childminder - harm to emotional development?

[emkana]

A mum I know has childminded a little girl since she was 7 months old. She is now 20 months old. The little girl is extremely attached to the childminder. In the morning she will greet her with "Hi mummy". Throughout the day she will panic if the CM as much as leaves her side for a minute. In the evening when the parents pick her up the child will cling to the CM, screaming because she doesn't want to leave her.
The CM, who is obviously fond of the little girl,, worries about what this will mean for the emotional development of the child. Can a child cope with the fact that it forms such a strong attachment with a person who is not a parent and who will not be around forever - when the girl starts school she will not be looked after by the CM anymore, they might still see each other but only occasionally. Will the girl be able to overcome this? Experiences appreciated!

Nobody?

i think that's just a clingy age.

I agree, but still it's quite upsetting when the child cries every night because she doesn't want to go home with her own parents!

I think the c/mer should be correcting the child when she call the C/Mer "Mummy" I reg get called this (as I'm sure teachers do too) and I just say "I'm Katy not Mummy"

I do think that 20m is a clingy age and she is 'likely' to grow out of it.

Absolutly and the C/Mer should be encouraging the child to feel happier about the separation

it is quite commmon for children to bond with another person who is looking after them - if i have a child calling me mummy or some other name i turn it into a joke by calling the child a name such as fred! gets the message across in a fun way and not upsetting the child

Even if you start off minding a child full-time, it is more than likely that the child will start doing sessions at a nursery/pre-school as they get older. By the time the child starts school, they would obviously be doing less hours with the childminder.

My first-ever minded child, 6 months old, started as full-time. Gradually, over the years, our time together naturally lessened as she did a couple of morning nursery sessions, then another couple more, etc. I was unable to collect her from the primary school she attended, but it was a gradual separation. I still see her (she's now 12), and I still have a lovely, close bond with both her and her mum. She (the child!) loves having a huge, great bear-hug, and loves being reminded that she was my first mindee!

My mindees sometimes called me "mummy", perhaps by accident, but also because my own children were around calling me "mummy". I would just reply by saying my own name, then answering whatever it was they were asking.

I think the close bond will be beneficial for her personally. Of course it might be upsetting for the mother, but better the child feels loved with her carer.

I think it's probably quite good for her emotional development, as long as it declines gradually rather than suddenly. But as the Prisoner says, playgroup, nursery etc. will take care of most of that.

I agree it's healthy to have a bond but it is an extremely clingy age. What the CM doesn't see is what happens when the parents get home, or what happens in the morning when leaving the house (the journey to the childminder's may be enough of a transition to calm her down and get her excited about the rest of the day).

My dd used to get confused with who to call 'mummy' at that age but also with 'daddy' so I knew it wasn't just because of the CM! - she has now grown out of that anyway.