Feel guilty about not doing enough "stuff"/activities with DS. Should I be doing more?

[Honeybee79]

Hi

My DS is 12 weeks old and is generally content. I have a night time routine (he goes to bed and sleeps from about 8.30pm through to 8am). I am trying to establish a very loose day time routine too based around working with what he already does of his own accord.

The other mums I know (generally NCT but not all) do SO MUCH stuff with their babies. Every day it's either baby massage, baby yoga, sensory, baby swimming etc. I don't do any of this and feel bad. Instead, we play on DS' mat, in his chair or on his changing mat, we look at bright little books as he sits with me and we go out for a walk every day. I often meet friends for a coffee or someone comes round to my place for a coffee.

To be honest, I don't do all the baby activities because I still feel stressed and anxious having to be somewhere at a specific time, I don't drive and we're counting the pennies while on maternity leave. But is DS missing out? Should I be trying harder?

Feel a bit inadequate! Any thoughts or advice? Thanks.

Thanks for responses. All very sensible.

I do like the idea of drop in activities or pay as you go but other than that I'm happy as we are. DS gets to meet my friends and my DH's all the time and I think it's good for him to see new faces and get used to meeting people. I'm sticking with what I'm comfortable with - sod the rushing around to loads of classes

I did a fair amount with DD (now 1.5) from the start - but mostly because I would have gone mad without getting out of the house and making friends, as I didn't know anyone with a baby until I went to a group.

In the first six months I went to a bf cafe, baby massage (4 sessions), library singing sessions (every fortnight), new parent group, then started my own group in my village...but all of these for my benefit, really, as DD didn't get much attention, I drank coffee and chatted, mostly! All cost £1 per session or less and stopped me from going mad.

I do still remember a lot of sitting watching TV while feeding, though.

Now I go swimming with DD, and have coffee at friends' houses (work three days a week) - these friends being the ones I made at groups. So it worked for me, and I'm not mad fixed on them now...but I know it's not for everyone.