Co-sleeping - how do I get her to settle at night?

[igetmorelovefromthecat]

I am co-sleeping with DD2, 4 months old. Which is fine and works out really well during the night as when she wakes I hardly notice, she just latches on and then I go back to sleep. But the problem is, she is generally ready for bed at around 8-9pm. So I take her upstairs and lie with her feeding her until she is well asleep, then go back downstairs.

10 mins later she starts grizzling. So I go and lie with her and feed her again until she is settled. Repeat every 10 mins until either I give up and go to bed myself or she comes back downstairs and grizzles there as she is actually dog tired.

She will only stay settled in bed if I am next to her but I don't always want to go to bed at 8pm! I resent not having at least a bit of an evening to myself.

Well, I'm someone whose baby didn't go to sleep till 3am unless I was walking around with her in a sling, so I think you have it quite good.

But on a more positive note for you, it's early days and things will get better. The key is to get her to go to sleep without being latched on to you, but you might have to wait a couple of months for that to happen.

For now, take the opportunity to sleep.

I had to use a dummy with mine as she had such a strong sucking reflex. This helped settle her a lot although annoying when she lost it and cried out for me to replace it! But at least I didn't physically need to be there the whole time.

Wannabeglam - poor you! I guess maybe things aren't actually that bad for me! You are right I know (or at least hope) things will get better with time.

IgglePiggle - a dummy had crossed my mind, not sure if she will take to it as we did try it when she was very small and screamed all the time in the car, she soon got wise to it and just kept spitting it out. She still screams all the time in the car. But could be worth trying again now for sleeping, all she wants to do is have my nipple in her mouth, she is not actually feeding.

I have had to stop co-sleeping with my 3 month old dd as she wanted to use me as a dummy all night and would not sleep otherwise. Consequently I was unable to move an inch and became very uncomfortable and achy and of course couldn't sleep. If she did unlatch herself she would plonk her head on my boob and want to sleep like that! It is a shame because I really liked the idea. She sleeps so much better now she sleeps next to me in her pram or crib.

In the evening ds clusterfeeds a lot, a bit like your dd. I used to pop him in his moses basket next to me ( or later on a safe bit of sofa) so i could watch telly/read etc then just give him wee feed when he grizzled. Then pop him back. Repeat till I'm ready for bed.

I think the advice is not to let them sleep in a room on their own till 6m so i didn't want to put him upstairs (plus like you I'd have been up and down)

I don't really get comfort sucking. Even when ds has been on the boob for ages there is always milk in his mouth so i figured if I stopped him he'd just need these calories some other time.