worried about treatment of neighbours baby

[funkydemon]

Their ds is 10 months old.My neighbour was telling me how he has decided to "wean himself off milk".....she said he currently has 1x 8oz bottle of formula a day and the other drinks are ribena,milkshake and hot chocolate in a bottle.

All he eats is crap,ie quavers,hot dogs,rubbish like that.

I have confided in a friend about it who thinks i should make an anonymous "tip off" to a HV

I cant confront them myself as they are they types who would probably get nasty

Im worried if i tell a HCP that i will be outed as i think they would know instantly it was me.

Does anyone think if i told a HCP they would possibly be able to do a "routine" check on him?

and is this as bad as i think it is? just a bit worried for him really.His gums were bleeding the other day which she put down to teething but i have never heard of this...could it be down to poor diet? he is always covered in spots too

I would be inclined to say something to the mum especially about the bleeding gums. Something to make her think twice? Ask her what the HV said about his diet? See how she reacts to that and take from there?

All those sugary drinks, it doesn't sound great!

I do remember the baby brother of a friend of mine being given lots of ribena and other juices. His milk teeth grew through brown.

Perhaps you should make up an anecdotal friend, and mention something to your neighbour. You could tell her about my friend's little brother as a friend-of-a-friend story. Might not work miracles but she might do some Googling out of curiosity.

Those drinks for a 10 month old don't sound good but how do you know that all he eats is crap? My DS is nearly 2 and when I drop DD off at school he always cries so I give him a biscuit. To the other mums it must seem as though all he eats is biscuits but that's not the case at all. It's just a brief snapshot of someone's life.

unfortunately i know she feeds him rubbish as whenever i have gone round there his baby walker tray is full of crisps...always.I babysat for him for an hour a few weeks back and she gave me a packet of quavers and a bag of milky buttons.
She said when they last went out he had a burger from maccy ds.That he enjoys the crusts from pizzas and pasties.The parents live on a diet of crap so i really cant imagine them going out of their way to cook anything good for him plus i dont think the mum even cooks atall.

and please this is not a .I feel sad for the baby and i think the mother just genuinely doesnt realise what she is doing

thanks for comments so far

It is the milk aspect i think i am worried about most as i thought with the crap diet at least he was having some formula to provide a little bit of nutrition but what has he got left when that is taken away!?

and the salt factor,she has no idea obviously....im worrying that they are going to make him seriously ill

It takes a village to raise a child they say. I'd be tempted to say something to HV. Really really sad.

I would go with the previous suggestion and make up a 'friend of a friend'. Make the story slightly different and more extreme and see how she reacts.

If you are really concerned, could you speak to your HV about the situation (without mentioning names) and find out what their procedure would be? You could tell her it's a hypothetical question, you were just wondering etc.

I think it's worse when the parent just doesn't have a clue so I think saying something to your HV would be a wise call. The mother probably has no idea what she's doing to her baby. V sad but have seen several mums like this.

Quite worrying about the lack of milk he's getting each day too...

Say something to the HV for the kids sake all that rubbbish can't be good and it sounds like she needs proper advice/leaflets on what to give to young children. Don't give them your name nor any clue to who you are but say you are worried.

Eeeek!! My DD is 11 months old and has 2 bottles a day but only takes a total of about 10oz!! Some of you are concerned about this little boy only having 8oz...mind you my DD has a great diet full of fruit and veg, cheese yogurts etc..

Poor little boy. That is so sad. His baby walker tray full of crisps..grim :( I don't get it. Im often called "cruel" by my own relatives because my baby at 11 months old has never tried juice or crisps, or chocolate or even biscuits. IMO it is so easy to cut up lots of colourful fruit for them. My DDs love it!

I don't know what i would do if i were you. Probably tell a HV. I hope someone can do something, the bleeding gums isn't a good sign :(

"social services is WAY WAY OTT"

I can't see that a single poster has suggested social services. So, yes, it would be OTT but I don't see the relevance of that to this thread...

I'd concentrate on worrying about the diet - as others have said, some babies take more milk than others, and if they're eating a good, calcium rich diet, may not need as much milk as is "advised". I would have thought you would be able to tell a HV in confidence and for them to then follow up with the family with healthy eating advice / advice on salt intake etc.