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Parenting

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Original poster

Kissing teenagers goodnight

43 replies

PrettyCandles · 12/11/2010 16:17

As the dc get older do you continue going into their bedrooms to kiss them goodnight when you, yourselves, go to bed? Does there come a point when you wouldn't go into your teenager's room while they sleep?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Shodan · 13/11/2010 21:26

Shattered my illusions I can tell you, Goblin.

Goblinchild · 13/11/2010 22:34

You mean the realisation that your little baby boy is all grown up?
At least he doesn't play helicopters in front of me
(Ref to another thread, bad form Goblinchild)

supersalstrawberry · 13/11/2010 22:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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Shodan · 13/11/2010 23:02

Erm, yes, Goblin. Ahem.

Helicopters? Helicopters?

Nope. No idea on that one. Your Bad Form is safe with me

WannabeNigella · 13/11/2010 23:21

My ds is almost 4 and we have kisses goodnight at storytime every night and then I ALWAYS go in to see him when I go to bed and I might not always lean over and kiss him but I always make sure he's tucked in and stroke his cheek, squeeze his hand or similar.

Can't imagine when I'll stop, sure I will but not for a long time I don't think.

Original poster

PrettyCandles · 14/11/2010 07:42

Yeeeeees, Shodan and Goblin, there is a bit of that, too.

Ds1 used to get undressed in his sleep, now he realises that he sleeps very hot and often goes to bed nude. Sometimes we find him sprawled on top of the covers, fast asleep of course, and "Up periscope!" (dh's expression). Amusing in a little child: he's always been - how should I put it? - very responsive. But, as he approaches puberty, it makes me think that perhaps there are some things even a mother should not see!

OP posts:

onceamai · 15/11/2010 01:15

DS = 15. Still say night night may not be a kiss because usually I'm in bed before him. In which case he will come in and give me a kiss sometimes. At 15, however, the only way to discipline them is to threaten a kiss in the car as you drop them off for school .

DD = 11. Still snuggles up with me whenever she can, ie, Mon to Thurs when DH is away.

Earthymama · 15/11/2010 01:47

My two are 32 and 30 and I kiss them when I meet them, when I leave them and at odd points in between.
My DGS1 is 13 - still kisses and says I love you, though I don't embarrass him in public, DGS2 is 7 - pretends to run away but the kindest, sweetest boy and loves kisses. DGD is 5 and knows her kisses get her just what she wants!
DGS3 is 4 days old and can't escape! He smells divine so I sniff as much as kiss!
We are all very affectionate with one another and long may it continue, it's a blessing.

nooka · 15/11/2010 05:06

I tuck in and kiss my two at night at their request. ds (11) gets annoyed and calls out for me if I forget, dd (10) is less bothered, although she is more inclined to get up to kiss dh goodnight (for some reason I am the designated tucker-in-er). I don't tend to go in to their rooms after that any more, I did when they were tiny, but it just tailed off, probably because their lights are off so much later now, so it's only a couple of hours before I go to bed. I guess when they were much smaller I wanted to remind myself what they looked like/how lovely they were . also they seem to take a lot longer to go to sleep now, so I don't like to disturb them. Plus dd's room is a bit of a death trap in the dark!

nooka · 15/11/2010 06:52

Actually going in to steal ds's book just now, I realise the other reason I don't kiss him after he's gone to sleep. He sleeps with his head under his covers/pillow!

MadameSin · 15/11/2010 10:20

My ds1 is almost 14. He still asks me to go to his bedroom after his in bed. I always give him a big kiss and a hug and tell him I love him - don't usually kiss him after that, just check in on him later. My other ds is 7 and he gets loads of kisses at bedtime and again when he's asleep before I go to bed. I love watching them sleep ....

TheLogLady · 15/11/2010 10:27

DD1 is 14. she goes up on her own and has a kiss as she passes.

DD2 is 12. still insists on being tucked in and 35 kisses. Thank the lord for the sky pause button.

I check them both as I go to bed, usually telling DD1 to stop reading and go to sleep.

Winetimeisfinetime · 15/11/2010 10:49

I kiss my ds (nearly 17) every night and tell him I love him and he always says 'love you too'. We have always done this and he still tolerates it and now has to facilitate the kiss { on his head ) by squatting down a bit, so I can reach him.
It usually happens as I go to bed but occasionally he is in bed before me and if he is awake I will tap on his door, go in and kiss him goodnight.
He will always be my lad and I will always want him to know I love him and it won't be long before he has flown the nest so I need to get as many kisses in as possible now.

ajandjjmum · 15/11/2010 10:56

One of the joys of having DS home from uni last week was that I could give him a snuggle on the two occasions he went to bed before me! I know he's only humouring me now, but I think secretly it's one of the things he misses.

DS and DD would normally kiss us all goodnight before they go up, and goodbye when they're going out.

DD (17) will still sit on my lap for a hug occasionally.

Winetimeisfinetime · 15/11/2010 11:21

I will miss ds so much when/if he goes to uni, ajanjjmum and hope that he too will still humour me with a bedtime snuggle, when he comes home. :)

InmaculadaConcepcion · 15/11/2010 14:13

Aw, I like this thread!

I remember when my three cousins were in their teens, my Aunt calling "Love ya, DS1, DS2, DS3!" and all of them calling back "Love ya, Mum!" as they headed for bed - not at all embarrassed to do so in front of us visitors.

I hope I'll still be giving and getting regular kisses and "I love you"s when DD is in her teens... (9mo now..)

SandStorm · 15/11/2010 14:24

I go in and give my 7 year old a kiss on my way to bed (and put her duvet back on the bed). I look on my 12 year old but rarely give her kiss simply because there's so much crap on her floor I would probably trip over something and fall on top of her. If I know there's safe passage then, yes, she gets a kiss as well.

But they both get and give loads of hugs and kisses anyway. In fact they both prefer to sit on my lap even if every chair in the room is vacant and it doesn't seem to matter which room it is - lounge, kitchen, bus stop etc.

I wouldn't have it any other way. :)

QueenOfProcrastination · 15/11/2010 17:33

My parents both used to give me and my DB a kiss goodnight, even when I had to move back in after uni! As we got older, mum's bedtime gradually became earlier than mine and DB's but she still popped in to our rooms to give us a kiss goodnight, as did dad who always goes to bed at midnight. I didn't think anything of it until reading this thread, but am really glad they did carry on. On reflection it is one of the best things they did when I was a difficult teenager to make me feel loved as I always got a kiss goodnight no matter what fight I'd picked with them earlier in the day!

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