How to help my overweight 10yr old DD?

[beechtree]

I would really appreciate some advice about how best to help my lovely but overweight 10 yr old DD?

She was born over 10 pounds - has always been solid (and is the shortest girl in her class) but recently has got really round.

It's making her miserable. She eats what her three thin brothers eat; home cooked stews, pasta dishes, baked fish, vegetables and fruit and doesn't get fizzy drinks or fast food etc.

She doesn't want to play active games like they do though - but always says she's hungry.

Should I risk problems with food in the future by treating her differently from the boys? ie. giving her much smaller portions, cutting out her carbs?

My doctor says she is old enough to put on a diet but I am dragging my feet - it doesn't feel right.

I noticed that some weight loss groups now take younger members but that seems an extreme response. Would be grateful for any thoughts/advice....thanks

how does your dd feel about her weight?

is she snacking secretly?

has she had her thyroid checked?

rather than give her smaller portions, can you bulk her plate up with more veg/salad?

what does she have for breakfast? maybe something like porridge with banana will keep her fuller longer?

does she like dancing? can you get her into an activity that is fun and requires energy?

ime getting round can just be a little phase and once she gets taller she will naturally thin out. I agree about risking problems with food if you put her on a diet.

does she have supper?
could you cut down on portions and change foods without her realising?

I wouldn't mention the word diet to her at all, infact banish it from your families vocabulary!
The connotations people get from that word can cause lots of problems.

I would maybe make smaller portions, small amounts of fruit, and a big drink an hour /45 mins before meals at home.

Then find her an activity she does like, exercise needs to be fun for her, otherwise she will end up hating it and rejecting any forms of exercise in the future.

Does she like dancing? swimming or ice skating?
Does she like animals? Do you have any neigbours who could lend you a dog once a day for you all to take for a walk?

Its important not to single her out, or make it obvious etc, you only need to make small changes that all the family can make and im sure she will feel more positive.

Great to read your responses - I do agree about not using the word 'diet' and trying to get the whole family involved in 'healthier eating' instead.

She is really upset about her weight - not helped by brothers doing what brothers do - such as teasing her about her size.

She does love dancing and goes to a weekly class and swims too but doesn't run around like the boys do playing rugby and football in the garden at every opportunity.

I think I will get her thyroid checked though just in case... and I like the idea of a drink before meals.

It's the moment they all come in from school that's difficult - they're ravenous! Any ideas for healthy snacks then to keep her going til supper?

Beechtree, my youngest dd is 11 and struggled for a long time with weight and her response to it. My view was always that as she grew if she did not put any more on it would all sort itself out but it made her miserable.

In the end she took herself in hand with my help after long chats. She uses the wii fit and that weighs and measures her sorts out her goals and makes her focus. She cut down her portion sizes, learned to say no to sweets, cut down bread and snacks and increase fruit and eats nothing to excess and has managed to lose a stone.

It is a difficult thing but in the end she seems very much in control these days and whilst still a little chubby I know if she keeps going it will fall off as she grows and she will know how to control her eating and weight properly and sensibly.

The wii fit is great by the way.

They will all be better off having a big drink of water, or non concentrated juice diluted with water.

They don't need a snack before dinner, really they don't!
If they insist they are still hungry after the drink, a small bowl of wholegrain cereal, and i mean a set portion, like 35gms with some SS milk.
Or a small cup of veg soup.

But, they really don't need it.
How long do they wait for dinner?
Is there anyway they ca get their homework done before dinner so they are occupied and not concentrating on having something to eat?

My three all launch into a snack as soon as they walk through the door ravenous and yes I think they need it. Lunch is at 1.30 and we dont have dinner till 6pm at the earliest. They only take one sandwich, water and fruit for lunch and I see no reason not to give them something when they come in at 4pm.

Healthy is stuff like fruit, carrot sticks, toast and peanut butter, a piece of my healthy bran loaf sometimes they have a piece of cheese and an apple or some cereal.

That all sounds good - thanks! I like the idea of a Wii Fit too - sure we will all get a lot of use out of it.

I'll also try the drink/juice option when they come in - and a small snack - since we also don't have supper until around 6pm.

Perhaps I should put more in their lunchboxes to keep them going?

They get a sandwich, fruit and water at the moment which you would think would be enough but they would happily chew on their arm when they come in they are so hungry!

Feed them their dinner when they get in and are at their hungriest and then fruit later on with a glass of milk maybe.

Why don't you take up slow jogging and get her in on the action at 10 she is old enough to do this and it would be good to get her into some sort of regular fitness if she is prone to carry extra weight.

I was podgy for a very short time when I was about 6 and was put on a diet - 30 years later and having been admitted to hospital for eating problems on more than one occasion I have to say that putting a child on a diet os a bad thing and you must do it for the whole family so she does not feel singled out.