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bullying please read and help if you can

9 replies

cheeryface · 19/10/2010 21:49

ds2 started at high school this time. hes quite naive compared to alot his age who now seem to be on the street till all hours , on facebook etc etc when hes not.

anyway,all seemed to go brilliantly well for the first few weeks. he made a friend etc. then he fell out with this friend and since then hes been spending all his time on his own while this ex friend and crew are whispering about him , walking past telling him everybody hates him and things.
last week ds2 text me to say this boy had threatened to jump him , so i told him to go to the teacher which he did. they have some mentors whom he says have been talking with each of then seperately . one teacher told him to write down everything that this boy says to him but according to ds2 he wrote a list of about 7 things in a different lesson where the teacher told him to rip it up and throw it away.
ds2 does not explain things very well, he tends to tell you a tale and leave you completely confused as to what hes even on about! so, im finding it hard to really figure out exactly whats going on. but , i know he has been eating lunch on his own.
i keep filling up with tears thinking about it.
i said i would come to school tomorrow and talk to someone myself but he doesnt want me to.
what the hell do i do ?

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cheeryface · 19/10/2010 22:13

.

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GivesHeadlessHorseman · 19/10/2010 22:16

Sad Does he make friends quite well generally, or has he had these problems at his primary school? And do you know what they fell out over?

MadameCastafiore · 19/10/2010 22:17

Go in and ask for their anti bullying policy and then read it and ask them which step they are on.

Normally scares the bejesus out of schoold enough to get them to act.

I would also go and speak to the parents of the kid but that depends how scarey you are. I am quite scarey!

GettinGhoulish · 19/10/2010 22:27

Hi cheery, I have no advice, hopefully someone else will come along in a minute, just wanted to empathise - it's so painful to hear about them being excluded. My ds is 8, and hate seeing him unhappy over friendships.

When did your ds fall out with his friend?

I hope you get to speak to the school - they will be able to tell you what has happened and reassure you they're sorting it out.

Notquitegrownup · 19/10/2010 22:32

Cheeryface - so sorry to read about your ds. Heartbreaking, isn't it, when you have to see them going through this.

When ds1 had similar problems we enrolled him in a karate class twice a week. It had the advantage of letting him spend time regularly with kids out of school in a structured environment, was good for self esteem and gave him something to talk about, nd was well taught, even for kids who aren't into sport a lot.

It's not an answer to how things are in school, but it is a good confidence boost and one which may help whilst other problems are being worked on.

cheeryface · 19/10/2010 22:46

hi,thanks for the replies. givesheadlesshorsemen, he isnt one to be on his own at all.he did have friends at primary although it was a big group of lads who all played football together and there was often falling out.

he fell out with this lad about 2 weeks ago, they were supposed to be forming a band (ds2 is learning the drums )but from what i can gather this lad is very bossy and he didnt want to take any of ds2 input so they argued.
notquitegrownup, i aggree about the karate. ds2 has been doing karate for 3.5 years now (2nd , brown/black striped belt ) and he gets on well with people there.

madamecastafiore, would like to know where the kid lives , sadly i dont! dh is very scary even whennhe doesnt mean to be lol although i am very un scary.

I thought ds2 would have had no problem on the friends side of things i hate the thought of him alone even though he tells me hes ok i think hes just trying to be macho.

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cheeryface · 19/10/2010 22:47

2nd kyu i meant doh

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cheeryface · 20/10/2010 10:18

i have had a text from ds2 saying this kid is at it again so i have phoned the school who are speaking to his head of year and getting back to me.
is it unreasonable of me to feel like going up there and confronting this boy myself? id really love to put the wind up him grrrr

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Notquitegrownup · 21/10/2010 09:01

Well done for him texting you and for the school on responding so quickly. It's much much better if the staff can resolve it for you, and that they are fully aware of the situation as you can work together with them on this, to make sure that it is stamped out.

Let us know how he gets on.

Thinking of you

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