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Original poster

I am about 5 minutes from force feeding this child...calm me down...PLEASE

35 replies

girlylala0807 · 17/10/2010 17:53

My ds who is 1.6 is seriously testing me today. I made him his dinner, he threw it on the floor. I gave him a banana, he mushed that into the floor. I have made him porridge, he wont eat it. I have now put waffles in the oven in the hope he will eat those.

What am I going to do if he wont eat them...he has to eat! Help!

ps..the food issue is only 1 in a long line of things he has done today. His behaviour has been very odd...

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sarah293 · 17/10/2010 17:54

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usualsuspect · 17/10/2010 17:54

Maybe he is coming down with something? don't force him to eat

misdee · 17/10/2010 17:55

he doesnt have to eat.

stop giving him food.

give him a bath, and relax.

later on offer him some toast.

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Original poster
girlylala0807 · 17/10/2010 17:57

This is just one of the hardest days ive ever had with him. Im sure there will be many more to come!

I wont make anymore for him. Maybe I should ignore and see what happens.

OP posts:
colditz · 17/10/2010 17:57

He's probably nbot hungry, give him a drink of milk, and a bath, and put him to bed. He might be teething, he might have an upset tummy, he might feel sick, you don't know because he cannot tell you, so follow HIS instinct not to put anything in his mouth. He does not HAVE to eat. He won't die in one day!

Weegle · 17/10/2010 17:57

maybe he's brewing something?

and honestly? ... he doesn't HAVE to eat. not this one meal anyway. So stop making new things, refuse to enter the battle ground, go and play his favourite game with him, and leave some bread and butter on the table and if he fancies it he can have it later with no/little commenting.

With food I repeat the mantra - it is my job to lead the horse (child) to water (food), it is not my job is make it (child) drink (eat). Take the stress out - a normal healthy child won't starve itself, honest Smile

FrameyMcFrame · 17/10/2010 17:57

perhaps he's not very hungry today.

Wouldn't worry unless it goes on for a few days.

MadameCastafiore · 17/10/2010 17:58

If he doesn't eat it is not the end of the world.

If you force feed him it could be the start of years of not eating due to emotional trauma associated with having food rammed down his neck!

Do not start giving him something else if he doesn;t eat either this will startr you on a long road of having to cook him 3 different dinners each night.

DO as Riven says put a sandwich down and in an hour pick it up and chuck it away if he hasn;t eaten it but ignore the fact that ot is there completely.

Please don't make food and meal times an issue - I had it all of my life as a child and have copious amounts of food related issues now.

TheUnmentioned · 17/10/2010 17:58

just leave him, he's not hungry. this isnt odd behaviour though i accept its frusrating - it IS normal , keep telling yourself that

onceamai · 17/10/2010 17:59

Agree with Misdee. You are upset because he doesn't want to eat. If I only ate when I am hungry I wouldn't now weigh what I did at 9 months pg! (and that was more than 11 years ago and yes I lost it all by the time dd was 8 weeks old). It really doesn't matter. Forget about food for a while - he'll eat when he's ready.

phipps · 17/10/2010 18:00

Too many choices. Ask him if he wants the waffles and if not leave him.

Original poster
girlylala0807 · 17/10/2010 18:02

Im sorry, I know this is all an over-reaction on my point, im just about at the end of my bleedin tether with him today.

He does have a wee bit of a cold and has been drinking lots.

Its the whole putting food in his mouth then spitting it out thats annoying me. Is this just what children do?

OP posts:
Igglybuff · 17/10/2010 18:02

He might not be hungry. Might be ill. My DS is 1 and has a nasty cold. Didn't want his tea tonight which is fine by me - I know I go off my food when under the weather!

onceamai · 17/10/2010 18:02

It is when they don't want it so please stop trying.

Original poster
girlylala0807 · 17/10/2010 18:04

Ive not actually forced anything on him, i came on here to let off stem first.

I wont either. Wont help in the longrun i guess.

OP posts:
Original poster
girlylala0807 · 17/10/2010 18:05

*steam

OP posts:
bumpybecky · 17/10/2010 18:05

he might have a really sore throat and find swallowing difficult. Have you tried offering yoghurt or other runny yummy stuff?

missing food for one day isn't going to do any harm you know :)

if he's being a total pain move bedtime forward a bit!

colditz · 17/10/2010 18:07

Children who WANT their food don't spit it out. he doesn't want to eat. offer a drink of milk and then give him a bath and put him to bed. mealtimes are OVER today./

togarama · 17/10/2010 18:08

One of the most useful bits of advice I've received about toddler feeding is to consider what they eat over 3 day periods rather than on a daily basis.

DD has days when she barely eats and days when she eats normal meals with us.

I also second the bit of advice of just leaving a sandwich out and letting him get on with it. DD is much more likely to eat when it isn't a "performance" with lots of encouragement and applause. The more attention we pay, the more she plays with her food (e.g. chewing up and spitting out) rather than eating it.

Good luck!

bicarbonateofsoda · 17/10/2010 18:11

Agree wholeheartedly that the main problem is with the idea that he HAS to eat - he doesn't!

With a cold and probably molars coming up soon I wouldn't expect him to want much anyway - I wouldn't if I felt rough.

spookerv1xen · 17/10/2010 18:16

awww OP i feel your pain, my DD (simialar age) does this all the time. best thing to do is give him finger foods and then if he doesnt want it, just take it away. if they are hungry they will eat.

can i just ask tho OP, do you want him to be full so he sleeps through the night? coz i sometimes get stressed when dd doesnt eat as i worry she will wake up in the night. sorry if i am off the mark but just wondered!

onceamai · 17/10/2010 18:18

Girly la la etc., actually, I understand where you're coming from, being a mummy is really hard and really frustrating and we have all been there. It's not the end of the world, he's actualy a lucky little boy to have a mummy who cares so much. But at the end of the day he's probably not hungry. Don't worry about it, he'll eat when he's ready and probably not when you you are desperate for him to. It's not that far off bedtime (unless he's anything like mine were). Light a candle, have a glass of wine, hot bubble bath, get ready for Downton. Hope you have a good night and tomorrow's another day.

Good luck.

Original poster
girlylala0807 · 17/10/2010 18:21

Hi,

no im not trying to feed him so he sleeps, just because he has not eaten much today or for the last week really. He drinks plenty though.

Its days like this im thankful foe CBBC. I was always the one who would never let a child watch tv...I soon changed my mind.

Time for bed soon enough!

OP posts:
becaroo · 17/10/2010 18:28

fluids are much more important if he has got a virus of some sort eg; cold etc.

I give up with my 24 month old...he eats it or he doesnt...his choice. I dont offer anything else though. Perhaps your ds has a sore throat?? If so, how about offering yoghurt or jelly tomorrow?

DollyTwat · 17/10/2010 18:28

Whenever ds1 was like this and i kept getting more things for him, I'd end up wearing it later after he'd thrown up. So I learnt that it usually meant he was coming down with something.