Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

How to deal with 2.6yo hurting baby sister?

4 replies

PutTheKettleOn · 14/10/2010 18:53

DD1 (2.6) has been really good since DD2 (4 months)arrived, no signs of jealousy, wanting to help change/bath her etc. But recently a couple of times she has really made her cry and seems to think it's funny.

I sometimes need to leave them in a room alone together, such as popping to the loo, or if I'm in the kitchen and they're in the lounge right next door where I can see them. Twice now I have left them alone just for a few minutes and have come running back to the sound of DD2 screaming and DD1 giggling. The first time she said she tickled her, the second she poked her in the eye. She was sent to the naughty step both times but still seemed to think it was really funny. So I thought, ok, just never leave them alone together, lesson learned.

But just now I was playing with DD1 while bouncing DD2 on my knee and out of nowhere DD1 just 'tickled' her really hard in the face, making her cry, then she laughed. I asked if she thought it was funny hurting her sister, did the whole 'look, she's crying, you hurt her, that's not nice' etc but she still carried on laughing. Sent her to the naughty step but I was so mad,and it just didn't seem to sink in.

Is it jealousy? Attention seeking? I originally thought it was because she knew making the baby cry was a sure fire way to get me to come back in the room, but why would she do it when i'm right there? And show no remorse whatsoever? She is not normally naughty. I'm just at a loss how to deal with it especially if it carries on.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
pocketmonster · 14/10/2010 20:43

I'd say it was a combination of jealousy and attention seeking. Don't forget though that your DD isn't old enough to understand that the baby will be hurt or that the crying is as a direct result of what she did.

Can you try to include her in whatever you are doing with the baby - so if you're bouning the little one on your knee, get your daughter to gently tickle her feet or hold one of her hands. That way she will feel part of it and won't need to divert your attention.

FranSanDisco · 14/10/2010 20:48

I think you need to make a fuss of the baby and ignore your dd when she does this. Even though you are telling her off she is still getting your full attention. I have the same age gap with my dcs and can remember this behaviour from dd vividly.

pocketmonster · 14/10/2010 21:56

I disagree - she's only 2.6 - you really shouldn't ignore her. That will just make her feel excluded so her (natural) jealousy will get worse.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

PutTheKettleOn · 15/10/2010 18:21

thanks everyone - I had a friend over today who has 3 kids and she suggested the same as FranSanDisco - don't punish the behaviour but just pick up the baby and make a fuss of her, so DD1 will soon realise it has the opposite affect as she wanted! But I'll also try and make her feel included more in other situations and teach her how to play nicely with the baby.

Fingers crossed something works!

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page