Parenting - I have three kids and no life. I need some helpful suggestions to make it right.

[PadmeHum]

My three kids are wonderful. DS1 is 9; DS2 is 6; DD is 3.

I have a really great DH - we've been together for 18 years.

Beyond kids, work, TV, renovation and occasional BBQ on a Saturday, I realised with startling clarity this morning that there must be more to life.

Up until very recently I have accepted that my life revolves around the kids. When DS1 was little DH and I still managed to do quite a bit, after DS2 it was a little bit more difficult but we were still ok. After DD was born we moved countries. The nett effect of having no support system and always being incredibly busy is that we no longer go out, I no longer read, I no longer exercise, we have no interests other than those of the kids.

How can we get out of this funk. Give me a kick up the arse - I know I could go out every night after the children are in bed for a run/walk. I could rustle up a friend or two if I really wanted to to go to the cinema. I could even really push the boat out and get a babysitter and go out for dinner with DH.

I just seem to have lost the inclination and am a little concerned at my lack of concern (iyswim). My energy levels are low and I just can't seem to lift myself out this rut.

I need some suggestions on how to put the yahoo back into my life.

PS - I am 36 not 96 by the way

You need fear.

sign up for a marathon and tell everyone about it

Plough your life savings into a friend's shonky business venture.

throw a wedding anniversary party, and my mistake invite three times as many people as you wanted to .

Get a job that is above what you think you can do.

Take three months off work and go to South America...

Go to college to study electronic engineering,
....

just don't fucking decorate, like a friend of mine always does when she,s a funk. really, how many new kitchens actually improve your quality of life?

Thanks SF.

I've tried the marathon one and ended up looking like a tit when I slithered out of it .

I like the idea of fear though. I have become so staid and boring.

I think I might investigate doing something like skydiving for charity or the like. Sounds cheesy but maybe it'll be the kickstart I need.

We won't talk about redecorating, I think this has what has sucked the life force out of me. We are living through a stalled renovation (the 6th one we've done) and I am just over it, I think it's had a profound effect.

PadmeHum
I am like you but 41 and DD2 is only 8 months (only 2 kids). I have no energy at all in the evening, I live abroad too. But I hope it won't last too long.
What about organising a girls'night out? and book a babysitter for an evening for starter and then you can do something more regular. Charity events, women associations, expats gathering, museum visit?
Part time job? even if it is just some odd translations or english support lessons for teenagers?
Berlitz usually is seeking for native speacker to train them as adult language teacher....
good luck

Thanks Mamaloco.

I work part time in a demanding job. So I suppose this is another factor.

I am half wondering if I shouldn't go to the doctor to discuss this fairly crippling apathy.

It's tough living abroad. Thanks for the suggestions, I am going to try and do a girls night out.

www.goldcoastskydive.com.au/index.php

December holidays.... mmmm....

I have just joined a choir and am loving it !

May be you should go to the GP, check your blood, may be it is just a bit of anemia.
Yes it is tough! it is the lack of support I guess, it is difficult to build a new network and too find all the relevant infos.

Your three year old will start school in a year I imagine. In the meantime introduce some structure into your day and stick to it. Perhaps you should also be grateful that your time is by and large your own to devote to your children. Many many mothers who work full time would love to be in your shoes.

Start a bookclub? That way you have to read a certain book by a certain date.

Ours meets once a month at people's houses. The choice of book is sent out to us by email in advance for the next 12 months. We all pay £3 per month (at the meeting) and the money goes to charity. The hostess provides refreshments (relevant to the book if they want to). I buy my books from Amazon (usually used versions). My DH reads the book after me and then we discuss it too.