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Original poster

Dreadful guilt wrt ds1.

4 replies

nickytwotimes · 01/10/2010 09:29

Hi all.

apologies for rubbish typing - holding ds2, aged 4mths.

Ds1 is 4 yrs and a lovely wee thing. Ds2 as most of you will know from my numerous posts has been ill since birth but is much much better now. still v. high maintsinsnce though.

I have pnd. i have lots of support though, including from my mum who lives a few doors away.

anyway to the point, ds1 has been looked after A LOT by mum and i feel bad - like i have rejected him. Sad

today i have been invited to a friend's house. there will be other mums with babies but bo older kids. ds1 would be welcome but would be bored stiff and a bit of a handful potentially and as i say, ds2 is stilll v. hard going. my mum has offered to take ds1 out for a nice afternoon, but i feel so bad not taking him with me.

i needc some other opinions on this. can any one offer them?

thanks a lot

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thisisyesterday · 01/10/2010 09:34

ask him what he would like to do

sometimes they just need to be with their mummy, so he may want to go with you, even if it's boring

or he might want to go and have a lovely afternoon out. if so that's fine too!

KnittingisbetterthanTherapy · 01/10/2010 09:36

Possibly daft question but don't suppose it's possible for DS2 to be looked after by your mum and for you to take DS1 alone? Or would this not be the right time to do that given the lack of company for him?

Could you let him have a nice afternoon with your mum today and then you have him on your own for a bit tomorrow?

Spinaroo · 01/10/2010 09:38

Are you feeding the little one?

Could your mum take him and let you go, but with your ds1?

Or do something else, just you and ds1?

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Original poster
nickytwotimes · 01/10/2010 10:05

Thanks for your responses.

I think I will ask him what he fancies doing.

I can't leave ds2 with anyone for more than a few hours as I am feeding him and he is on a growth spurt and also my boob is often the only thing to calm him! This afternoon will be about 4 hrs, so not reALLY do-able.

This weekend it will be just us 3 and Daddy which ds1 always seems to enjoy tbh.

But yes, I think the best option is to ask him.

Thank you. I don't know why I didn't think of this! Sleep deprivation? Fuzzy brain?!

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