Do I go to school & tell DD that DH is off to hospital today?

[KatyMac]

He went off without notice a year ago July & it caused major (longterm) upset

Now we have been talking about him going for over a week but she doesn't know it's today (we only just found out)

But I have 3 options

1. don't tell her
2. tell her at school & leave her there
3. tell her at school & take her to her nana's

telling her at school risks upset & making it bigger than it is
Not telling her has been proved to be a bad idea but it's easier

Oh hell I don't know

Can you tell her after school?

He will have gone in by then & we won't see him until Saturday

I would go to school and tell her, then give her the option to go to her nana if needed - I know she has had some problems with her sight, could not telling her affect these?

yes i would totally tell her.

go in with the option of taking her to nana's or staying at school, whichever she prefers.
but do tell her

DH doesn't think we should tell her as he spoke to her saying he might not be home

i would still do it. if it caused a big longterm upset last time it may again. it;s one thing not being home, and quite another not being home because you're in hospital.

i think if you tell her she is getting the message that she is included even tho she is at school... that you;'re thinking about her.
if you don't tell her she may think well, this is the 2nd time he has gone to hospital and no-on e told me.

I agree

DH is less convinced & it's actually the 3rd time - but the first was planned and more like this time

Do tell her and give her the option of going to her nana's.

DH may have said he might not be home, but unless her specified he may be in hospital and - more importantly - she understood this, then she will be upset that she wasn't told.

Conflict - will it be easier when he goes??

have you made a decision yet Katy? Very difficult situation for you.

We didn't & she was fine

DH had spoken to her about it this morning & had organised it all

Which leaves me a bit about worrying about it all

Beat him with a big stick. :) Glad it all got sorted one way or the other.

Major, major strop at bedtime - I am the evilest mother in the whole world just like Simon Cowell

Just because I said she had to sleep in her own bed

Oh dear. I hope it gets easier.

I gave in - so all was well with the world